The three points we hold to when sharing with people how we have made long distance work for us include; being independent, don't compare your relationship with other people's, and last but definitely NOT least...Communication!
Being independent
- Don't be obsessed about what the other person doing ALL OF THE TIME.
-Find yourself a hobby/Don't give up the things you love. These help keep your mind busy.
-Don't put your friends on a shelf. Seriously, when you are miles away from your person you need an outlet. Keep your friends and family close and be sure to keep in touch with them.
Don't compare your relationship to other people's relationship
-Your relationship will NOT be like the one couple you admire and look up to on YouTube. It will not be like your parents, grandparents, friends, etc. Your relationship will be your own in every way so just roll with it!
-Every couple has their own story and past and issues
-Some couples argue more than others
-Some couples can afford to visit their person once or twice a month, others have no choice but to wait months on end.
COMMUNICATION
-Communication is a huge part of building trust and love and admiration. Communication is really what strengthens ANY relationship whether your miles away, countries away, or two blocks away, you HAVE to actually communicate.
-When it comes to the big conversations and heart to hearts PLEASE do not attempt to text it all out. Texting increases the risk of miscommunication and misplaced emotions. So it doesn't matter how awkward or deep the conversation may be, make the point and effort to at least pick up your phone and CALL THEM. Or Facetime!
-If you feel sort of like a jealous girlfriend or boyfriend because your person is talking to someone and you may feel threatened, don't be embarrassed by that! Again trust is built through actual communication. So if you feel jealous I suggest not going straight to accusations but pick up that phone and call them and calmly tell them how you feel about the situation and why you feel that way. Give your person the opportunity to know what you're thinking and then communicate with you through it.
Many believe that long distance relationships just can't work. And honestly when a relationship is grounded on the physical aspects of a relationship then yeah it's not going to work. Long distance relationships are not for the faint of heart. It's hard but certainly NOT impossible. When the proper communication is done in a timely manner and the couple makes the effort to not only live their lives while they are apart but to also communicate and not compare relationships, long distance relationships more often than not make a couple STRONGER and more MATURE. For our relationship we focus our hope and love on God. And we encourage you to take that small yet important step as a couple to put your relationship in God's hands. Good luck to you my beautiful readers!
"We love because he first loved us." 1 John 4:19 (ESV)
