In my eighteen years of living on this earth, I have come into many different people's lives. Many people have come into my life and have made me a better person. I have lifelong friends from middle school and high school. These people, I know, will be by my side forever. In this time, I have also met individuals who have made me build character and realize that it is okay to let people go. Here are three signs your 'friend' is actually a snake:
1. Jealousy Is Always A Red Flag
I have been fortunate enough to not be the worst person to be around for a lot of people I know. I honestly can say I only know maybe a handful of people who do not like me. It is not to brag, but to show that you can be kind and people will like you. It is that simple. Your supposed friends can sometimes see this as threatening. If you are chosen for a certain position, receive a raise on your job, or even find a new partner and your 'friend' always seems to find a way to put their accomplishments over yours instead, that can be an alarming sign. Your friend should be congratulating you and wanting you to win in all aspects of life. A friendship should not be a competition to see who can out do each other. There should be an uplifting spirit every time you do great.
2. They Always Seem To Leave You Out
Maybe I am wrong but it would be great to have a party or just hang out with friends to catch up on life. Except, it's even cooler when you are not invited on purpose. I am being sarcastic. At a young age my mother always told me, "you will not be invited to every birthday party everyone has. Not everyone will be your friend and that is okay." I guess some people's parents weren't a straight forward with theirs kids as mine but this was true. I never understood why so many people felt hurt when they were not included in the activity. Those people who did not invite you obviously do not care how you feel because they are not your friend. If this situation were reversed, you would make sure that they were invited. You care about them but they do not feel the same about you. It takes wisdom to look at the situation and see that they take no valued interest in including you.
3. 70:30 Friendship Ration
Honestly this can be the most relatable red flag that some people see. There seems to always be a friend who you are putting so much energy into the relationship and they do not reciprocate. For some reason you always seem to care about this person who is not invested into the friendship. You are the one who always initiate the conversation because you realized you have not talked to them in a while. It is okay the first time but then it becomes the twentieth time you have texted them first and it is not fair. Maybe it is because you have out-grown each other or are just in different places in your lives. That is okay. But then you need to realize that your seventy percent you have been putting in needs to shrink. It should become a 50:50 ratio. Not that you do not care about them anymore, it is just growth and realizing your worth more than thirty percent, if that, of their time. It is okay to let a friend go. You may be still holding onto what your relationship used to be and it is just not that anymore. You learn from people and you grow. That is progress and like many people have said before, their are many more fish in the sea.
Many times, people come into our lives and change us for the better. They show their true colors and you have to let them go. Not to be mean but to keep your soul protected. Some friends may stay a while, or they leave. That is okay. You learn a lesson from it, you grow, and you persist forward with your head held high!
