Pride is the Death of You
"Love is gonna get you killed…But pride's gonna be the death of you and me."
Presently I am laying in bed after a long day of working outside, followed by hours of internet research for my forthcoming e-book.
I realize that I always think I'm the best at everything, even in the face of contrary evidence. When someone is absolutely better than me at something, I think "yeah, but I'm better at this other, cooler thing."
If they are better than me at something I've invested a lot of time into, I ignore it or tell myself, "yeah, but I am doing it my way which is better because…"
Going inside my body, the pride I feel is like a thin blanket resting over my torso and throat, and there is some mental energy where I imagine my brain is (I've never seen my brain so I can only speculate).
Letting this pride -this vanity- go, I begin to feel more whole in myself, and more at peace. As the pride lifts off of me and out of me my thoughts change.
I start to think
- "I can acknowledge that I am not the best"
- "If I acknowledged this earlier, I would have seen so many ways that I can improve, such as [this way] and [that way]."
- "Now that the pride has released it's hold on my thoughts and emotions, I feel the desire to submit myself to a master, or at least a process of improvement. I want to get better."
It's embarrassing to admit that yesterday my pride told me I am the best practitioner of meditation in the world. I can clearly see now how that feeling has held me back from going deeper, from really challenging myself and seeking out new experiences.
It even held me back from becoming a moderator of a Facebook group for meditation practitioners. My pride, unchecked, has sabotaged a lot of my efforts and goals throughout my life.
But enough about me… Where does pride hold YOU back?
Is it in your finances? Are you too proud to admit your little nest egg isn't going to be enough? That at your current level of income, you won't be able to travel the world, be there for important family events, or retire?
Is it in your career? Perhaps you are too proud to admit that you need to start over in a more meaningful, interesting field. That would require you to admit you've used years of your life on a path that wasn't the right path for you.
What about your love life? I've been too proud to admit that I'm lonely and not as good with the opposite sex as I like to tell myself. When I let go of pride, I can clearly see how it has held me back from getting the truly loving, growth-oriented, beautiful companionship of my dreams. Could it be the same for you?
And how about your emotions themselves? Are you too proud to cry? Too proud to let go of that anger? Too proud to call your mom or dad?
As the saying goes, "pride goeth before a fall."
The fall could be immediate like losing a job, or it could be in the distant future, like when you wake up and realize you've wasted years or decades of your life not following your deepest calling.
The fall could be when your family member dies and you never made amends, or on your own death bed when you realize the amount of joy and love lost to pride and ego.
Make the change today. Let go of pride and accept more love into your life.