Before turning 20 years old, I used to think that I wouldn't have experienced life enough to have any advice or input to give to other people. But, after reflecting for a little bit, I realized that a lot can happen in two decades. I still make some of these mistakes and am constantly working on myself, but aren't we all? Here are 10 things I've learned at 20 years old so far.
1. Don't sweat the small stuff
I know how difficult it is to stop overthinking. Your mind runs through all the bad scenarios and before you know it, your brain is spiraling out of control. Breathe. Stop stressing and overanalyzing life. I've often looked back at past events and things I used to worry about so much and laugh because they seem so insignificant now. I know that in the moment, it's hard to change your mindset, but chill out and I promise everything is going to be OK.
2. Your parents do have a lot of wisdom
20 years seems so small compared to the amount of time my parents have been on this planet. (Sorry if you're reading this Mom and Dad) It does get tiring listening to the same stories and mistakes they've made in the past. But, most of the time though, your parents are right, and just want to prioritize your well-being and happiness. They want you to thrive and make your own mistakes of course, but at the same time, if it's possible to avoid those minor bumps in the road, why not take the time to listen to what they have to say?
3. People will surprise you
This one's really simple, but one of the most meaningful things. Especially coming into college, I realized that people and life are so unexpected. One minute you think you've got someone figured out, and then damn, they just completely change your perspective on life. Maybe you thought you would never be friends with someone, or you misjudged them from the very beginning. Go with the flow. Give people a chance.
4. It's perfectly acceptable to do things alone
This is so hard to grapple with especially if you're a people dependent person like me. Since freshman year, I've hated the idea of eating alone in the dining hall or even going out to new clubs without my roommate by my side. What I've learned is that there's nothing wrong with being independent and doing things on your own. It's honestly such a good time to reflect on yourself and escape from the stresses of the rest of the world.
5. Never change for other people
Such a cliche, but so true. If you aren't being your authentic self, you'll only suffer trying to keep that front up towards other people. So what if you feel like you don't belong, or other people ostracize you? Not only are you mistreating yourself, but you're also surrounding yourself with others who aren't worthy of your efforts. Like Ariana Grande said, "Thank You, Next."
6. Save your money (or you will regret it)
Unfortunately, this is something that I continue to struggle with. That Champion hoodie that you've been stalking on Urban Outfitters isn't worth it at all. Trust me. Save your money for future life experiences. These are just material things that won't bring extended happiness anyway.
7. Treasure your grandparents
Who else would let you binge-watch Drake and Josh in their room until 1 in the morning on a school night? Who else comforted you and understood you like no other person in this world? All they want is to receive that one phone call from you, to make them feel as if they still hold that special place in your life, despite you growing up and having other adult priorities. As they age, their life becomes so much more temporary. Let them know that they still matter8. Words have consequences
Sometimes in the heat of the moment, we tend to say stupid things. As I've grown up, I've learned that taking those 2 seconds to reflect on your inner thoughts and hold back what you want to say make a difference. Even if you really, really want to tell that person off, it's best to sit down and keep your mouth shut, then deal with the future consequences.
9. Love yourself
You have so much love to give to everyone else around you, but there's one person you're constantly overlooking: yourself. Practice self-compassion. Stop bringing yourself down when your friends compliment you. Don't step on that scale and immediately regret having that late night snack at two in the morning. Look in the mirror, and smile because every day is a new chance to start embracing your self-worth.
10. God loves you, so don't worry too much
If it's difficult for you to accept the former, it's OK because someone out there does care about you. Sometimes it feels like we carry life's burdens on our own, and that no one can relate to what we are going through. Maybe people in your everyday life may not understand, but God does. Even if you don't believe in Him, he believes in you.
