On Being Homesick For My Parents' Home
Start writing a post

On Being Homesick For My Parents' Home

Just another one of those first-generation kids romanticizing the homeland.

On Being Homesick For My Parents' Home

As I’ve gotten older, I’ve found that more and more often, I am very, very homesick.

Maybe it’s the guilt of being in such close proximity to my culture and never learning about it, for complaining so much as a child rather than enjoying my time whenever I'd visit. Maybe I just miss my family, having people obligated to at least try to get along with me. Maybe I feel left out as my cousin’s children grow older without knowing my face. Maybe I feel stupid for the way my tongue seems to break whenever I speak my own language, the weakness in the way I insert English words into mumbled sentences, the times I wish I would have opened my mouth more to learn how to correct my mistakes.

It is probably all of those things, and maybe more, but I am almost starting to miss the sight of crows and the sound of honking car horns and the traffic that makes walking seem like the most comfortable method of transportation. These rather ugly little things–should I be afraid to admit it?–remind me of home, of the streets of the city of my birth, of the place where I have never really lived.

Though, of course, reminders also lie in the pleasant things: in the smell of my clothes, packed in suitcases and embroidered and sequined, and in the books on my parents’ shelves, covered in my language’s beautiful script. I remember the colors and the sounds and the liveliness of the city, the beautifully decorated rickshaws and the even more beautiful people. I am reminded by my own skin and my own tongue of the place I love most, the place I am longing for constantly.

I miss the greenery and the buildings, my family and the people I’ve never met but who look like me, the roads so full of people and so unlike the quieter streets of the city where I actually live, the sight of saris and salwar kameez and lungis everywhere I turn to see. I miss the street food that has never failed to upset my body (it’s delicious enough to forgive), the bustling markets where everyone bargains in slowly rising voices (even at stores marked “fixed price”), the smell and taste of spices and sweets and never a bland thing. I miss the fruits, the sweetest, best tasting mangoes in the world and the family gathering to eat jackfruit, the country’s national fruit. I miss lychee and guavas and starfruit, I miss kalojam and pomegranates, I miss eating everything with salt and red chili powder.

I might not miss the heat and humidity, the constant load shedding, the open sewers, the littered streets. But home is where the heart is, and sometimes I feel like I left mine in Dhaka.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Health and Wellness

Exposing Kids To Nature Is The Best Way To Get Their Creative Juices Flowing

Constantly introducing young children to the magical works of nature will further increase the willingness to engage in playful activities as well as broaden their interactions with their peers


Whenever you are feeling low and anxious, just simply GO OUTSIDE and embrace nature! According to a new research study published in Frontiers in Psychology, being connected to nature and physically touching animals and flowers enable children to be happier and altruistic in nature. Not only does nature exert a bountiful force on adults, but it also serves as a therapeutic antidote to children, especially during their developmental years.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

5 Simple Ways To Give Yourself Grace, Especially When Life Gets Hard

Grace begins with a simple awareness of who we are and who we are becoming.

Photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash

If there's one thing I'm absolutely terrible at, it's giving myself grace. I'm easily my own worst critic in almost everything that I do. I'm a raging perfectionist, and I have unrealistic expectations for myself at times. I can remember simple errors I made years ago, and I still hold on to them. The biggest thing I'm trying to work on is giving myself grace. I've realized that when I don't give myself grace, I miss out on being human. Even more so, I've realized that in order to give grace to others, I need to learn how to give grace to myself, too. So often, we let perfection dominate our lives without even realizing it. I've decided to change that in my own life, and I hope you'll consider doing that, too. Grace begins with a simple awareness of who we are and who we're becoming. As you read through these five affirmations and ways to give yourself grace, I hope you'll take them in. Read them. Write them down. Think about them. Most of all, I hope you'll use them to encourage yourself and realize that you are never alone and you always have the power to change your story.

Keep Reading... Show less

Breaking Down The Beginning, Middle, And End of Netflix's Newest 'To All The Boys' Movie

Noah Centineo and Lana Condor are back with the third and final installment of the "To All The Boys I've Loved Before" series


Were all teenagers and twenty-somethings bingeing the latest "To All The Boys: Always and Forever" last night with all of their friends on their basement TV? Nope? Just me? Oh, how I doubt that.

I have been excited for this movie ever since I saw the NYC skyline in the trailer that was released earlier this year. I'm a sucker for any movie or TV show that takes place in the Big Apple.

Keep Reading... Show less

4 Ways To Own Your Story, Because Every Bit Of It Is Worth Celebrating

I hope that you don't let your current chapter stop you from pursuing the rest of your story.

Photo by Manny Moreno on Unsplash

Every single one of us has a story.

I don't say that to be cliché. I don't say that to give you a false sense of encouragement. I say that to be honest. I say that to be real.

Keep Reading... Show less
Politics and Activism

How Young Feminists Can Understand And Subvert The Internalized Male Gaze

Women's self-commodification, applied through oppression and permission, is an elusive yet sexist characteristic of a laissez-faire society, where women solely exist to be consumed. (P.S. justice for Megan Fox)

Paramount Pictures

Within various theories of social science and visual media, academics present the male gaze as a nebulous idea during their headache-inducing meta-discussions. However, the internalized male gaze is a reality, which is present to most people who identify as women. As we mature, we experience realizations of the perpetual male gaze.

Keep Reading... Show less

It's Important To Remind Yourself To Be Open-Minded And Embrace All Life Has To Offer

Why should you be open-minded when it is so easy to be close-minded?


Open-mindedness. It is something we all need a reminder of some days. Whether it's in regards to politics, religion, everyday life, or rarities in life, it is crucial to be open-minded. I want to encourage everyone to look at something with an unbiased and unfazed point of view. I oftentimes struggle with this myself.

Keep Reading... Show less

14 Last Minute Valentine's Day Gifts Your S.O. Will Love

If they love you, they're not going to care if you didn't get them some expensive diamond necklace or Rolex watch; they just want you.


Let me preface this by saying I am not a bad girlfriend.

I am simply a forgetful one.

Keep Reading... Show less
Student Life

10 Helpful Tips For College Students Taking Online Courses This Semester

Here are several ways to easily pass an online course.

Photo by Vlada Karpovich on Pexels

With spring semester starting, many college students are looking to take courses for the semester. With the pandemic still ongoing, many students are likely looking for the option to take online courses.

Online courses at one time may have seemed like a last minute option for many students, but with the pandemic, they have become more necessary. Online courses can be very different from taking an on-campus course. You may be wondering what the best way to successfully complete an online course is. So, here are 10 helpful tips for any student who is planning on taking online courses this semester!

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments