What Mental Health Awareness Month Means To Me

What Mental Health Awareness Month Means To Me

Anxiety shouldn't define who I am, but it does.
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Anxiety has always been a big part of my life. It determines whether or not I get out of bed in the morning or what I will do that day based on how I feel. My sophomore year of high school, I was officially diagnosed with severe anxiety. I had always gotten nervous about big events or tests or presentations, but this was completely different.

There were many things that ultimately lead up to me going to see someone to get diagnosed. Once I had gotten the diagnosis, everything changed. Me getting out of bed in the morning now depended on what my anxiety was telling me, as opposed to what my body was telling me such as if I was too sick to get out of bed. Participating in activities was also a struggle because if I did not feel good about an event, as in thinking about that event made my anxiety spike through the roof, then I did not participate.

This changed my personality also. I used to be so outgoing. I used to go up to anyone and everyone and talk to them, and suddenly I shut down. If I didn't know someone, I wouldn't go up to them and start a conversation. When I was introduced to people I was very reserved and quiet. I am a very outgoing person, once my anxiety calms down and I am able to show my true self without that one thing stopping me.

Anxiety has also changed the way I saw myself and saw other people. I started to put others before myself and started neglecting myself completely. I still do. I put my own thoughts and feelings and opinions aside because I am so anxious about what other people think of me. I have a really hard time presenting myself to others because I am so obsessed with making the other person like me.

I have had to learn many hard life lessons. These are things that I am still learning and coping with. I need to not neglect myself. I have to put myself first. I also have to learn and understand that not everyone is going to like me. This is the one thing that I have the most trouble with because I want everyone to like me and if they don't, my anxiety spikes every time I am around them.

I have had such a strong support system through my journey. My mom is my absolute rock and is always there for me no matter what. I can always count on her to make me feel less anxious when my anxiety hits me hard, which it has recently. College has been a struggle for me. My anxiety has definitely shaped my college experience and I regret it. I want to not listen to my anxiety and be able to enjoy college, and sometimes I just can't. My grandma has been a huge part of helping me cope with my anxiety in college also. I know I can always call her and she will give me the best advice and help me get through whatever I am going through.

Cover Image Credit: Taylor Dean

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44 Lyrics For When You Need An Instagram Caption

Your caption is just as important as the filter.
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Choosing the caption for your Instagram can be almost as challenging as deciding on a filter. So, if you’re ready to post that Insta, but don’t know what to say, here are 44 lyrics for when you need an Instagram caption.

1. “Be young, be dope, be proud.” - Lana Del Rey, "American"

2. “I can’t really see another squad tryna cross us.” - Drake, "No Tellin’"

3. “Darling I’m a nightmare dressed like a daydream.” - Taylor Swift, "Blank Space"

4. “I’m throwin' shade like it’s sunny.” - Nicki Minaj, "Want Some More"

5. “I’m gonna live like tomorrow doesn't exist.” - Sia, "Chandelier"

6. “Find me where the wild things are.” - Alessia Cara, "Wild Things"

7. “If I was you, I'd wanna be me too.” - Meghan Trainor, "Me Too"

8. “Sweet like candy to my soul, sweet you rock and sweet you roll.” - Dave Matthews Band, "Crash Into Me"

9. “I swear this life is like the sweetest thing I’ve ever known.” - Drake, "Over"

10. “I hope you never lose your sense of wonder.” - Lee Ann Womack, "I Hope You Dance"

11. “But if you close your eyes, does it almost feel like nothing’s changed at all? - Bastille, "Pompeii"

12. “You may say I’m a dreamer, but I’m not the only one.” - John Lennon, "Imagine"

13. “You can’t choose what stays and what fades away.” - Florence + The Machine, "No Light, No Light"

14. “She acts like summer and walks like rain.” - Train, "Drops of Jupiter

15. “She’s a good girl, loves her mama. Loves Jesus, and America too.” - Tom Petty and the Heartbreakers, "Free Fallin’"

16. “Lights will guide you home, and ignite your bones.” - Coldplay, "Fix You"

17. “Say you’ll remember me.” - Taylor Swift, "Wildest Dreams"

18. I’ve got thick skin and an elastic heart.” - Sia, "Elastic Heart"

19. “Give me the beat boys and free my soul.” - Uncle Kracker, "Drift Away"

20. “One of these days the clocks will stop, and time won’t mean a thing.” - Foo Fighters, "These Days"

21. “Sunshine mixed with a little hurricane.” - Brad Paisley, Perfect Storm

22. “You are the piece of me I wish I didn’t need.” Zedd feat. The Foxes, "Clarity"

23. “Her mind is Tiffany twisted, she’s got the Mercedes bends.” - The Eagles, "Hotel California"

24. “Life imitates art.” - Lana Del Rey, "Gods And Monsters"

25. “Nobody said it was easy, no one said it would be this hard.” - Coldplay, "The Scientist"

26. “You’re gonna keep my soul, it was yours to have long ago.” - State Radio, "Keepsake"

27. “Celebrate we will ‘cause life is short but sweet for certain.” - Dave Matthews Band, "Two Step"

28. “It’s always darkest before the dawn.” - Florence + The Machine, "Shake it Out"

29. “There are many things I’d like to say to you but I don’t know how.” - Oasis, "Wonderwall"

30. “You say you want a revolution, well you know we all wanna change the world.” - The Beatles, "Revolution"

31. “God is great, beer is good, and people are crazy.” Billy Currington, "People Are Crazy"

32. “Well my heart is gold, and my hands are cold.” - Halsey, "Gasoline"

33. “I don’t want to be heard, I want to be listened to.” - Twenty One Pilots, "Forest"

34. “Where you invest your love, you invest your life.” - Mumford and Sons, "Awake My Soul"

35. “I think I need a sunrise, I’m tired of the sunset.” - Augustana, "Boston"

36. “All of these lines across my face tell you the story of who I am.” - Brandi Carlile, "The Story"

37. ‘Ready or not, here I come. Where you at? The night is young.” - Bridgit Mendler, "Ready or Not"

38. “In the land of Gods and Monsters, I was an angel.” - Lana Del Rey, "Gods And Monsters"

39. “Turns out not where, but who you’re with that really matters.” - Dave Matthews Band, "Best Of What’s Around"

40. “Know yourself, know your worth.” - Drake, "0 to 100"

41. “I’m little but I’m coming for the crown.” - Lorde, "Still Sane"

42. “Didn’t they tell you I was a savage?” - Rihanna, "Needed Me"

43. “Hands in the air like we don’t care.” - Miley Cyrus, "We Can’t Stop"

44. “I’ma keep running because a winner don’t quit on themselves.” - Beyonce, "Freedom"

Cover Image Credit: https://pixabay.com

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I’m Learning That I Don’t Have to React to Everything That Bothers Me

Every hard lesson serves a purpose in your life and you have two options: either let it define you or learn from it.

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For as long as I can remember, I have always been the person that "had to have the last word." I always had to have the last jab and I could never walk away from an argument without that. But slowly, I have begun to realize that this behavior is toxic, it drains you, and it prevents you from living a fulfilling life.

I used to be the type of person that wanted everyone to like me; I cared SO much about what people thought of me. But I've learned that I'm not going to be everyone's cup of tea and I cannot force people to like the person I am. In the end, I am confident in who I am and who I am becoming, perhaps that's more important. I have learned that it takes so much energy trying to win peoples approval and it fills you with nothing but emptiness.

It was a long hard lesson to learn, but I have discovered that not reacting to every situation that upsets me does not necessarily mean that I am okay with how things happened, it just means that I am choosing to take the high road and rise above it. By making this choice, it prevents me from giving another person power over my emotions. We will never be able to control what another person chooses to do or say, but we can control how we respond, how we handle the problem, and how much we take personally. In most cases, these situations say little about you and a lot about them.

I have always been a firm believer that everything happens for a reason, every hard lesson serves a purpose in your life and you have two options: either let it define you or learn from it.

If you choose to react to a situation, think about what it will change. Will it change anything? Sometimes, it is better to just let things be, let people go, don't fight for closure, don't ask for any explanations, don't run after answers, and lastly don't expect people to understand.

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