He’s leaning in, his white T-shirt perfectly soaked by the rain, his hair perfectly messy, his laughing smile perfectly white, his eyes perfectly captivating — it’s too good to be true.
Because it isn’t true. Because it’s "The Notebook." Because it’s your annual Valentine’s Day go-to, right along with Nutella and Oreos and mac n’cheese.
We’ve all been there, waiting for our perfect guy. Wishing he could magically show up on our doorstep instead of that pizza we ordered exactly 37 minutes ago (or with it). On this day, our voice of self-pity speaks a little louder than usual: “You shouldn’t be pining for love at the ripe young age of seventeen, twenty, thirty. You deserve better than this.”
In that case, the voice is right.
You shouldn’t be pining. You deserve better.
Believe it or not, ladies, there is better than watching Ryan Gosling. There is a whole world at your fingertips. You shouldn’t be sitting alone on your couch in the dark — you should be out in it.
Stop waiting for Romeo to take you out to that café on the corner. Go. Speak to the older lady in the corner booth. Pay for her coffee.
Stop wishing you were “the girl next door” from the movie and actually walk next door. Offer to play Mario Kart with a stressed-out mom's kid so she can have some “me-time.”
Stop dreaming about your future family with your white picket fence and 2.5 kids. Call your grandma. Go shopping with your mom. Help your little brother with his homework.
Serve soup at the homeless shelter. Give hugs at the nursing home. Bring toys to the children’s hospital. Get to know that kid that nobody talks to. Write that long-overdue thank-you note to your favorite teacher.
What if we stopped waiting for love and started being love?
To all the girls who were sitting alone on Valentine’s Day: you are beautiful. You have a great laugh. The way you throw your heart into the things you love is remarkable. You have friends and family who love you. Your moments of stress-driven tantrums show that little spark of madness that will compel you to do great things. Your story is unique- even the dark chapters- and it gives you a perspective that will help you change your world. So even as you sit in your sweats on the couch watching Netflix and eating that discount Valentine’s chocolate: You are over-the-top amazing and you are loved. The way to turn your special spark into something even more beautiful is to pass it on, to make someone else feel beautiful.
What if being single is a gift — a unique window of time in your life that allows you to concentrate on learning who you are and serving others in a way you will never have time to do later on when you’ve settled down with your Mr. Darcy?
Your knight in shining armor will come around — but don’t be a damsel in distress sitting in a tower waiting for love. Go out there and find it. While you’re finding it, be love.
