Immigration Didn't Kill Mollie Tibbetts, Men Being Unable To Process Female Rejection Did

Immigration Didn't Kill Mollie Tibbetts, Men Being Unable To Process Female Rejection Did

If this was strictly an immigration issue, we wouldn't see white men doing this over and over again, too.

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Men don't like to be told no.

Janise Talton-Jackson was shot dead after rejecting a man's advances at a bar.

Caroline Nosal's killer waited for her to get off her shift at work and surprised her by shooting her to death.

Lisa Trubnikova, a married lesbian woman, was killed by a man who was completely obsessed with her.

Andrea Farrington was shot 3 times in the back by a man that she was "playing."

Unfortunately, I could list more. One positive outcome of these horrific cases is they have helped open a dialogue about toxic masculinity, male-on-female crime and the inability for men to handle women's rejection.

So how come when the killer of Mollie Tibbetts, the subject of a national story about a missing college student, was found to be a man whose advances she rejected, the conversation shifted another way? That would be because the murders of the aforementioned women were all in the country legally. And Christhian Rivera was, allegedly, not.

To put it bluntly, blaming this murder on illegal immigration is absurd.

If violence against women was a problem because of illegal immigration, there wouldn't be stories like the ones above. There wouldn't be astronomically high rates of domestic violence.

Put simply, a lot of women would still be alive if American citizens weren't a problem when it comes to violence against women.

If a problem is widespread and persistent without even taking undocumented immigrants into consideration, the problem might lie outside of the realm of the perpetrator's immigration status.

In fact, there really is no association between increased crime and increased undocumented immigrants. According to Dave Mosher at Business Insider, "While tragic individual stories of murder are worthy of public attention and the victims worthy of justice, they are also single trees in a forest of data."

The bottom line is this: If Mollie Tibbetts' (and other women who have died at the hands of undocumented immigrants) killer hadn't come to the United States illegally, more than likely, she would still be alive. But that type of "if this, then that" mentality works with every killer, regardless of citizenship.

If Janise Talton-Jackson's killer hadn't gone out to the bar that night, she might still be alive.

If Caroline Nosal's killer had not gotten a job at that grocery store, she might still be alive.

If Lisa Trubkinova had never crossed paths with her obsessed killer, she might still be alive.

If Andrea Farrington's killer had chosen to work somewhere else, she might still be alive.

Every single woman who has died at the hands of an obsessed stalker, an angry partner, a random rejected stranger, an infatuated coworker, could have missed the situation altogether had something in either of their lives gone differently. Because immigrant or not, your chances of ending up on the wrong end of a terrible situation come down to chance: You were there, they were there.

If Mollie Tibbets had chosen a different college, if she had been working that night, even if she chose a different jogging path, this tragic chance encounter may not have happened.

If Christhian Rivera had lived in a different state, if he had made plans that night, and yes, if he hadn't come to the United States in the first place, this tragic chance encounter may not have happened.

But it did.

And it wasn't a result of his immigration status, it was a result of a culture where men feel entitled to women's bodies, conversations and time.

It was a result of men believing they have a right to a woman, however they please. It was a result of men being unable to handle the rejection of the women they feel entitled to.

Any man who gets so angry when a woman rejects his advances that he "blacks out" and murders her might have problems beyond being in the country without documentation.

Mollie Tibbetts' death is heartbreaking in every imaginable way. Young college students dying in the prime of their life is sad and frightening and infuriating.

But using this tragic situation, one that further demonstrates the dangerous side effects of male entitlement, to further an agenda against immigration is not only unproductive, it is harmful. There isn't an unbalanced epidemic of violence against women from undocumented immigrant men - fighting against an epidemic that simply isn't there is a colossal waste of time.

Beyond that, allowing a few select cases to mold your views (and, at the upper-political level, your policies) takes time and resources away from where they should be focused: In this case, violence against women from all races and citizenships statuses.

Not to mention, it goes to criminalize an entire group of people who, statistically, are not causing more problems than anyone here legally.

Shayanne Gal / Business Insider

Mollie Tibbetts' might still be alive if her killer didn't come here illegally. But she would also still be alive if he didn't feel entitled to her and her time. And a lot more women would be alive if the latter were true, too.

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An Open Letter to the Person Who Still Uses the "R Word"

Your negative associations are slowly poisoning the true meaning of an incredibly beautiful, exclusive word.
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What do you mean you didn't “mean it like that?" You said it.

People don't say things just for the hell of it. It has one definition. Merriam-Webster defines it as, "To be less advanced in mental, physical or social development than is usual for one's age."

So, when you were “retarded drunk" this past weekend, as you claim, were you diagnosed with a physical or mental disability?

When you called your friend “retarded," did you realize that you were actually falsely labeling them as handicapped?

Don't correct yourself with words like “stupid," “dumb," or “ignorant." when I call you out. Sharpen your vocabulary a little more and broaden your horizons, because I promise you that if people with disabilities could banish that word forever, they would.

Especially when people associate it with drunks, bad decisions, idiotic statements, their enemies and other meaningless issues. Oh trust me, they are way more than that.

I'm not quite sure if you have had your eyes opened as to what a disabled person is capable of, but let me go ahead and lay it out there for you. My best friend has Down Syndrome, and when I tell people that their initial reaction is, “Oh that is so nice of you! You are so selfless to hang out with her."

Well, thanks for the compliment, but she is a person. A living, breathing, normal girl who has feelings, friends, thousands of abilities, knowledge, and compassion out the wazoo.

She listens better than anyone I know, she gets more excited to see me than anyone I know, and she works harder at her hobbies, school, work, and sports than anyone I know. She attends a private school, is a member of the swim team, has won multiple events in the Special Olympics, is in the school choir, and could quite possibly be the most popular girl at her school!

So yes, I would love to take your compliment, but please realize that most people who are labeled as “disabled" are actually more “able" than normal people. I hang out with her because she is one of the people who has so effortlessly taught me simplicity, gratitude, strength, faith, passion, love, genuine happiness and so much more.

Speaking for the people who cannot defend themselves: choose a new word.

The trend has gone out of style, just like smoking cigarettes or not wearing your seat belt. It is poisonous, it is ignorant, and it is low class.

As I explained above, most people with disabilities are actually more capable than a normal human because of their advantageous ways of making peoples' days and unknowingly changing lives. Hang out with a handicapped person, even if it is just for a day. I can one hundred percent guarantee you will bite your tongue next time you go to use the term out of context.

Hopefully you at least think of my friend, who in my book is a hero, a champion and an overcomer. Don't use the “R Word". You are way too good for that. Stand up and correct someone today.

Cover Image Credit: Kaitlin Murray

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5 Things We Could Fund Instead Of Funding The Wall

In case you missed it Mr. President and others who are pro-wall, you don't have to have tanned skin to be an illegal immigrant.

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In case you've been living under a rock, a Florida man created a go-fund-me to help raise one billion dollars for the building of the wall on the United States and Mexico border. In regards to the border wall, there are plenty of arguments that go into the possible pros of the wall such as the wall will help decrease illegal immigration, help protect private property, and possibly save lives.

However, there are plenty of counter-arguments as to why the border wall is the worst idea in the world. One, there are plenty of other things that need fixing and funding before worrying about a dumb wall. If illegal immigration is such a concern, shouldn't we be fixing the system of becoming a citizen of the United States? Maybe we should be looking into reform rather than wasting tax-payer money on a wall that is only going to possibly help decrease illegal immigration from one country. In case you missed it Mr. President and others who are pro-wall, you don't have to have tanned skin to be an illegal immigrant.

In fact, there are plenty of other more pressing matters in the United States that could be fixed or on the road to being fixed if the government used the one billion dollars towards other causes. Here is a list of a few things we could fund instead and though this list is short, just let it be a way to spark ideas as to how your money can actually be used to benefit society instead of tearing it apart.

1. Flint Michigan's water.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pd2qxi2mF_4

The border wall go-fund-me is wanting to fund one billion dollars towards the wall. Estimated costs to fix Flint, Michigan's lead pipes an estimated $55 million. With the one billion dollars, we could fund Flint's pipes eight-teen times. To read more on Flint's water situation click here.

2. Planting 2,000,000 trees.

https://flic.kr/p/aTFcYn

It costs roughly $500 to plant one tree, with one billion dollars we could plant 2,000,000 trees. Mmmm oxygen. Let's make America green again...literally.

3. Eradicate polio for good.

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Polio_vaccination_in_Sweden_1957.jpg

Since 1998 polio has decreased by 99% and can be eradicated by a $1.3 billion dollar investment. Which the go-fund-me can easily make a big dent in helping meet that goal to help eradicate a curable disease. For more information click here..

4. Give public school teachers a $320 bonus check.

https://www.flickr.com/photos/cemillerphotography/40833964695

This past fall of 2018, there was an estimated 3.2 million public school teachers in the United States. Evenly divided up the one billion dollars could give each public school teacher a $320 bonus check for all of their hard work they do every single day.

5. 12,500 taco trucks.

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/File:Taco_Truck_St_Louis_MO.jpg

Forbes magazine estimates that it takes around $80,000 to start up a taco food truck...which means with one billion dollars we could start up 12,500 taco trucks. With there being 50 states this means we could supply 250 taco trucks per state. We the people in order to form a more perfect taco...

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