This poem reeks of low self-esteem. Every single person is a blessing! Sometimes, I can forget that and I find myself thinking, am I a blessing or a curse?

I'm trying to figure out if I’m a blessing or a curse.

When I first met you, is my introduction backed up by the devil or a holy verse?

Should you hold me closer? Or avoid the void that is my presence?

I don’t want to suffocate you any longer.

You may be stronger

without me.

Will I do right and you do wrong?

Will we be better off along the road, together or a part? Did I enter your life to break your heart?

Am I that cruel? To the point where I need to rule everything around me?

I’m trying to figure out if I’m a blessing or a curse.

Does my smile comfort you? Do you see what I’m truly trying to do? To help you and give you the best of me that I can.

I want that to be enough

to land in certainty that I am, in fact, a blessing

And my presence is not meant to get you stressing.

I wanna be your right hand.

I wanna know where I land when I fall into your world

Do I calm it down or do I make it cold?

To the point where you can’t figure out why you let me hold your heart for a while.

I’m trying to figure out

If I’m a blessing or a curse.

Because right now this question can’t be answered.

I hope I am a blessing to you. Because I knew as soon as I met you that a blessing was upon me,

I guess that’s just how it’s meant to be.

You’re a blessing and I’ll never know if my presence did the same to you…

this seems like part of a curse too.

- Christine Saint