Heart to heart: Personally I'm at that stage of life where I'm getting less of a kick fooling around and being stupid. Lately, I've been feeling a bit more inclined to actually do something substantial, to go beyond only caring about myself.
It took a lot of crashing and burning from said stupidity to get to this point, and in all honesty, I could see myself keep going that route if I wanted to…but it's not enough anymore, to be honest.
Yada yada cheesy young heartfelt reformation story get to the point.
I've wanted to "do something" for a while now, but it wasn't until recently that I've been really inspired to put substantial effort into business ventures and passions. One of them was to get more involved in the music scene in San Diego. Coincidentally, I had started talking to a friend who was in a similar boat, and we decided to rent a venue to throw a music show.
Mind you neither of us had actually thrown a show before. So it was very interesting coordinating everything for the first time. Here are some of the things I learned in the process.
Communication is probably the singular most important element in the universe.
Not just any communication…non-egoic, clear, effective, and devoid-of-any-emotional-garbage communication. Who's doing what, artist concerns, venue communication, and so on. Everything had to be explicitly defined to work. If there was an issue, bringing in your own negative energy did squat.
When you're in a project involving many people, a business facility, and money, you have to swallow your pride and address things as they need to be addressed. Trying to find an out when you have a problem, like blaming someone, berating yourself, or wishing things could be "different," does not work in high-stress scenarios like this. In any scenario for that matter.
(After the fact, this was a pretty sobering realization as well. You are always accountable for everything you say and do, not just in "important" situations. You just think you're not and can get away with being lazy, rude, and emotional because nothing is riding on it. The crazy thing is, you are a representation of what you are in every single moment of your life to others and most importantly yourself. There are no higher stakes than the present.)
There are about a million things that go through my head every day; it took a lot to become aware that other people are on their own trips and I have to account for that before I open my mouth. Just because I figure something out doesn't mean other people have or that our conclusions are the same.
Establishing a common ground for discussion has become extremely important to me now. In the end, it's about collectively understanding situations and moving forward as a group rather than understanding it your own way and expecting other people to just "get it."
Comfort zones have to be shattered and overthinking is a plague.
Along the process I had to do a lot of things I wasn't used to reaching out to local businesses, handing out flyers and tickets, occasionally giving bad or inconvenient news to the artists, dealing with logistical issues event day, and so on. In navigating new territory you have to hit the ground running.
Overthinking is useless in doing that. It's like you have this literal comfort bubble you've been in for the longest time and as soon as you step out of it, overthinking tugs you back in like a leash. Doubts, second-guessing, self-deprecation, all that yummy stuff. That only distracts from the task right in front of you, something you decided to do in the first place.
Moreover, overthinking is like a really tricky form of laziness that feels like productivity. Getting caught up in the details of this and that and oh maybe if I do it this way is like a subconscious reason to not take the plunge in whatever difficult situation you're facing.
Letting go goes a long way.
Event day I was extremely nervous, I'm not going to lie. We had included a charity for orphans in Mexico, so the stakes got higher, what with my family and friends all being there as well. Ticket sales hadn't been doing too well so I had decided to make the event donation based instead a week prior. Worst case scenario, it would be a dud and we'd get no money.
Then there came a point where it there was literally nothing left I could do. Doors open, all the work was already done, people were walking in. If it was a dud it was a dud, and if it was a success then great. Luckily it went well. We got a pretty decent turnout, a lot of good people helped, and we managed to chalk up $400 for the charity.
Just smile
It doesn't matter what you're going through. You can work on it, and ask for help when you need it, but don't let your temporary stress, anxiety, or other negative energy ruin your life while you're living it. It will always pass.
On that note, follow @yinyangsd and @familyreunionco on Instagram for future local music shows and cool events! Thank you for reading ❤️
