Growing up, I was taught that the right person would never make me compete for them. My mom always told me that I deserve more than being with someone who has an eye for other girls, while they're supposed to be committed to me. I've been with people in the past whom I never felt secure with because of the fact that in my heart, I knew I wasn't the only girl in the equation.

My feelings get extremely hurt if the guy I'm dating even checks out another girl when he's with me. When it comes to the Bachelor, the thought of watching the guy that I love dating other women right in front of my face, with no regard for my feelings, is absolutely degrading and disgusting. Even if I was chosen in the end, I would never be able to erase the image out of my mind of my "soulmate" falling in love with and being intimate with so many other women, while meanwhile, I was falling head over heels for them.

Something I can't seem to wrap my head around is the fact that the Bachelor(ette) goes onto the show claiming that they've had their heart broken so many times before. They make it immensely clear that they know how it feels to have their heart broken. Therefore, something about the fact that they willingly go on the show very aware that they're going to have to break the hearts of many just doesn't agree with me. This can also be looked at vice verse.

The contestants on The Bachelor(ette) usually claim that the reason they went on the show was to find love after facing so much hurt in the past. It blows my mind that after supposedly being hurt so much, they can willingly subscribe themselves to the emotional baggage they gain by going onto the show. It also gives off the impression that the contestants may have ulterior motives for being on the show (come on, you didn't actually think they were there to find love, right?). If my mission was to truly seek love and avoid hurt, the Bachelor(ette) is the last place I would resort to.

I get that everyone falls in love differently, and that's ok. Personally, I believe that love is a natural concept. I've always believed that love is meant to take us by surprise and bring people together by fate. In my opinion, bringing in the factor of competition takes away the whole natural aspect of love. To me, this makes the relationship itself seem less genuine, in addition to the fact that the world is involved in it. I also believe that a relationship should be between two people and that the world has no right to a front row seat in it. Being on a dating show adds pressure because of the inevitable input of audience opinions and the demand for entertainment.

The basis of the relationships portrayed on the show are very unrealistic, which often provides the couples with false expectations after concluding the show. I could probably fool myself into being in love with someone within a matter of months too if they took me on exotic adventures and dates straight out of romance movies all in such a short time frame, but that's just not how relationships work in real life. Without experiencing the everyday struggles and simple day to day functions with your partner, do you even truly know them?

By the time the couple is off the show, they are faced with a rude awakening to the fact that their relationship is very different from the illusion that they lived in while on the show. Struggles are so important in relationships because they help us learn to overcome things as a pair. Without facing opportunities to grow together, it's very hard to experience a clear idea of what a life with someone will be like.

Not only is every season, "the most dramatic season in Bachelor(ette) history," but every season displays the double standard that the contestants allow themselves to be held to. Maybe I'm missing something, but I don't see the thrill in giving your all and being loyal to one person when that person can be with up to fifteen people at once (and with that being acceptable). In my opinion, the fact that the Bachelor(ette) can fall for so many people at once, meanwhile, the contestants fall deeper and deeper each week for just one person is a huge tease and an even bigger red flag. The show is always so dramatic when a contestant's ex-partner makes an appearance on the show. You are literally dating fifty people and obviously, they are on the show and chose you over their exes. You're winning.

To conclude my rant about the Bachelor, can we just talk about the fact that in the process of finding love, the contestants feel the constant need to tear each other apart? It seems like way too often throughout the process, people get so caught up in beating their "opponents" that they forget the real reason why they are there (or claim to be there). This brings us back to the aspect of competition, taking away from the genuine intentions of finding love. In the heat of the competition, many people may become more obsessed with winning than they are with actually finding love. The cattiness and badmouthing that occurs add to the many degrading aspects of the show.

On one hand, I understand the direction that modern day entertainment is steering towards. I get that people find satisfaction from all the drama portrayed on "reality" dating shows. However, I truly hope that people understand that these couples are not "goals" or role models. The relationships portrayed are far from reality. All I see when I watch the Bachelor(ette) is a group of people, who are so hungry for attention, resort to putting their hearts on the line. I'm not saying that every contestant on the show is there for the wrong reasons, but I just don't see how anyone who has truly been heartbroken thinks that going on the show is their best option. I'm also not implying that you support the message of the show just because you enjoy watching it. I will just never be entertained by watching people willingly go through the one thing I try to avoid. Heartbreak.