Who's Your Daddy?
Start writing a post
Entertainment

Who's Your Daddy?

Nine moments in musical theater that DNA testing would've come in handy.

122
Who's Your Daddy?
Edited by Tori Combs

Musicals are a fun way to forget about life for a while, but sometimes they leave you a bit flustered. If you're anything like me, you've sat and watched a show or two and said to yourself "Oh the irony," or maybe, "This is a disaster!" Many of the people in musicals could've benefited from modern science such as DNA testing. Here are nine moments where DNA testing would've been extremely helpful. Spoilers.

1. Mamma Mia!

We all know and love the musical Mamma Mia! which is composed entirely out of songs by the hit band ABBA. In the show, twenty-year-old Sophie is getting married and wants nothing more than her father to walk her down the aisle, but there's one problem: she and her mother don't know who her dad is. This takes place in the 1980s, meaning that paternity tests were around, and had been pretty accurate since Sophie was conceived. The biggest question is, why hadn't her mother found this out sooner? It would've saved money on postage and prevented three past exes from meeting under circumstances that didn't paint her in the best of light. Plus, it seems a bit inconvenient to have three men walking you down the aisle of a church...

2. Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street

Sweeney Todd is a story of revenge. When returning back to London after being wrongfully banished, the barber embarks on a journey to get back at the men who sent him away and stole his wife. With him is a young sailor who has become a friend, and later falls in love with Todd's daughter. It would've been nice to know who she was and all considering he commits a felony to get to her.

3. Phantom of the Opera

This one is pretty simple. Throughout the show the principle character Christine Daae refers to the Phantom as an "Angel of Music," "Friend," and even at one point her father. Christine, your father is dead and this man is trying to kidnap you. Stockholm syndrome is not cool.

4. Spring Awakening

Ah, the musical about promiscuous German teenagers in the 1800s! When would a DNA test not come in handy here? One moment in particular was when Wendla got pregnant and would not tell anyone who the father was.

5. Into The Woods

In "Into The Woods" we learn that the Baker's family has been cursed by the Witch who lives next door and that as an additional price for his father's stealing from the Witch, his sister has been taken captive. The Witch raised Rapunzel as her own daughter. If only that poor girl knew. If only she knew...


6. Wicked

In the untold story of the Wicked Witch of the West we learn the untold story of her conception and why her skin is green. Is it really just a big coincidence that she looks like the Emerald City gave birth to her? What really surprises me is that it took the Wizard so long to figure out that he was her father. Maybe if they had used a bit science instead of their magic then they would've known.

7. Annie

Well, this one is pretty simple. Annie never knew who her birth parents were.

8. Hamilton: An American Musical

With Alexander off at war, are we 100% sure that Eliza is telling the truth?

9. Shrek: The Musical

Is this guy actually related to one of the Seven Dwarfs? I mean, Farquad has Grumpy's temper and all, but has zero respect for himself, zero work ethic, and zero sense of style. Maybe he and his father should sit down and talk about how he was most likely adopted.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
beer on the beach

Summer is hot and humid, and it's almost like summer was made specifically to drink the refreshing, cold, crisp wonderful, delicious, nutritious nectar of the gods. Which is none other than beer; wonderful cold beer. With summer playing peek-a-boo around the corner while we finish up this semester, it's time to discuss the only important part of summer. And if you haven't already guessed, it's beer. There are few things I take more seriously than my beer, in order are: sports... and beer. Here are my favorite summer brews:

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

7 Reasons SoCal Rocks!

75 degrees and sunny, plus, no humidity. I mean do I really need to say more?

1646
woman in black and white long sleeve shirt carrying girl in red jacket in Venice beach
Photo by Jeff Hopper on Unsplash

SoCal summers are the best summers by far, and honestly, no argument is needed. But, if you aren't sure why SoCal summers are the best, here are 7 reasons why!

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

25 Lyrics for Selfie Captions

Because let's be honest, we all use lyrics.

53875
woman takes a selfie for social media
Pixabay

Sometimes you can't think of the perfect caption for your Instagram post. I love using lyrics as my captions because there's so many great lines in songs that just seem to fit in the moment. Here are some lyrics that could work for your selfie or pictures of you with your friends!

Keep Reading...Show less
Entertainment

Bruce Springsteen's Top 7 Lyrics

Everything Bruce says in his classic rock songs.

20323
bruce springsteen album cover born in the usa

Anyone who was born and raised in New Jersey (or anywhere really) knows of Bruce Springsteen, whether or not they like him is a whole other situation. I hope that his hundreds of classic rock songs and famous high energy performances, even in his sixties he can put on better concerts than people half his age, are at least recognizable to people of all ages. Love him or hate him (I identify with the former) you have to admit that some of his songs and interviews have inspirational quotes and lyrics.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

New England Summers Are The BEST Summers

Why you should spend your next summer in New England.

5726
Marconi Beach

Three years ago, I chose to attend college in Philadelphia, approximately 360 miles away from my small town in New Hampshire. I have learned many valuable lessons away from home, and have thoroughly enjoyed my time spent in Pennsylvania. One thing that my experience has taught me, however, is that it is absolutely impossible to beat a New England summer.

You cannot beat the beach. Believe it or not (which many people may not), New England has a long and beautiful coastline. Most of my high school summers were spent sitting on the Wall at Hampton Beach, getting sunburnt and eating Acai bowls from The Secret Spot. The Wall was the place to be both during the day and at night. We begin our days there with a KB's bagel and coffee, and end them with pizza and ice cream. It’s not a New England summer without that 4 p.m. text from someone, “Who wants to meet at the Wall tonight?” Nighttime is for Tripoli’s Pizza, the sound of waves, and wishes on shooting stars. Wednesday nights are especially important, as those are the nights that Hampton Beach sets off the weekly firework display.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments