A Japanese author wrote a book that I found out about on a Korean television show from 8 years ago. I always thought about reading that book, but I was in middle school and what middle-schooler (who is being bullied) has money?
The book, The Courage To Be Disliked: How to free yourself, change your life and achieve real happiness, really changed how I thought about the aspects in life that I thought were natural for me. I never realized until I read the title that I really was afraid to be disliked so I always put on a smile and acted nice because I could not handle someone hating me. I had already had people hate me for no reason throughout elementary and middle school so I unconsciously retracted into myself and put on a front for others to see. I never realized that I had a mask on. It was only after reading the book that I realized its inevitable for anyone to be untouched by hatred and the fear of being hated. We put ourselves into situations and then look for an easy way out that does not change us. The reason we put ourselves into those situations is because we want to change, but our minds give up soon after and the easy way out is appealing.
The book is in the format of a conversation between a philosopher and a young man who is also an aspiring philosopher. The format confused me for a bit of time, but the way that the characters have a conversation is comedic (in a dark way) and made me think about how the young man's thoughts. His thoughts and how he argued were similar to my own ways and that was the reason I was never able to truly love myself and accept others will always judge but that has nothing to do with me and I need to live for me.
Similarly, I have been interested in a product online called the Buddha Board, which is just a board, a brush, and some water. This teaches you that creating art is nice, but the art of letting it go is what helps you to relax and use that time to be mindful. I found it at my University by chance and am very tempted to buy it since, after a few uses, it really helps with my anxiety. It is a great tool to practice letting things go that bother you, as well as understand that all the good things you have are temporary so don't get too attached to the material things and negativity but treasure the relationships, feelings, experiences, and opportunities you have now.
Original Buddha Board - $34.95
Mini Buddha Board - $14.94
This new year, don't be afraid to be YOU!
YOU live for YOU!
If you stopped caring about others, you would realize how nice is to fly free and be YOU!
I won't wear a mask anymore! I refuse!
