Why It's Okay To Have A Few Close Friends Rather Than A Group Of Friends

Why It's Okay To Have A Few Close Friends Rather Than A Group Of Friends

They're like your adopted siblings, but better.

These days, it's all about having 'squads' and 'squad goals,' and you can't go anywhere without seeing a group of friends together. Whether they're twelve-year-olds or college students, there is always that pit feeling in your stomach when you know you don't have what they have. And that's okay. Some people only have a few close friends, and that's actually better than having a large group of friends. Sure, having a large group of friends is nice, and it's great to hang out with a lot of people. You are part of a group and it is always nice to be a part of something. But for some people, hanging out in a group is sometimes daunting. Everyone is having different conversations, and you’re over there just sitting quietly and trying to get into a conversation with someone.

Sometimes it’s better to just have a couple of close friends. With them, you always feel wanted and the conversation flows naturally. And most of the time, you guys have been friends since you all were in diapers, or in kindergarten. You all grew up together, so you all know each other’s deep secrets that you promised you wouldn't tell a soul. And you all know who each other likes, and every time they talk to them, the rest of you giggle like crazy. The closeness between all of you is real and there is no way that it could be broken.

With a large group of friends, sometimes it’s hard to communicate with each friend. There is more than one type of friend in the group: there is the party girl, the funny person, the smart one, the flirty one, the party-pooper and so on. Everyone in the group is different, so the group dynamic is different. When everyone is together, there is usually about two or more conversations going on between different people and that makes it hard to get in the conversation. So you are always left out in conversations and it usually hurts. Most of the people don’t even know who everyone likes, or what everyone has been through in their lives. And if there is a lot of people in the group, sometimes it’s hard to find that closeness that a close group of friends would have.

With anything else, there always is an influence to have a large group of friends. Look at Taylor Swift for example, she has a large ‘squad’ with many celebrities and models. There is Selena Gomez, Lily Alridge, Behati Prinsloo, Lorde, Zendaya , Hailee Steinfeild and more.

And with the idea of ‘squad goals,' there is always more behind the actual picture. A picture does not define a friendship. Yes, the whole group is there. But what if the two girls at either end of the photo are fighting? They wouldn't show that in the picture because they wouldn't want to broadcast their fight. And even with pictures of people out having fun with friends, look at the actual big picture. If they went on a trip, and they posted more photos of the group together, it could mean that they only want photos of them together, to show off that they have a great group of friends. And if someone wanted to show off that they had a great group of friends, that person could be insecure about their friendships and relationships with others and thought that posting a lot of photos with their friends would show that they have good and close friends.

Close friends do not need to worry about showing off their friendship. They know that they have a great, close bond and that posting pictures together hanging out doesn't really mean much. And with a few close friends, it’s easier to be yourself without anyone judging you and asking why you are acting weird. Close friends know that their friendship is valuable and that they could never lose it. And with close friends, you are not just friends, but you are sisters. And a non-biological bond could never be broken.

It’s okay to have a few close friends than a large group of friends because with your close friends, it’s more than just a friendship. It’s a bond for life. They are your sisters, your bridesmaids/maids of honor and your confidantes. Don’t ever lose them.

Cover Image Credit: Polyvore

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Sorry Not Sorry, My Parents Paid For My Coachella Trip

No haters are going to bring me down.

With Coachella officially over, lives can go back to normal and we can all relive Beyonce’s performance online for years to come. Or, if you were like me and actually there, you can replay the experience in your mind for the rest of your life, holding dear to the memories of an epic weekend and a cultural experience like no other on the planet.

And I want to be clear about the Beyonce show: it really was that good.

But with any big event beloved by many, there will always be the haters on the other side. The #nochella’s, the haters of all things ‘Chella fashion. And let me just say this, the flower headbands aren’t cultural appropriation, they’re simply items of clothing used to express the stylistic tendency of a fashion-forward event.

Because yes, the music, and sure, the art, but so much of what Coachella is, really, is about the fashion and what you and your friends are wearing. It's supposed to be fun, not political! Anyway, back to the main point of this.

One of the biggest things people love to hate on about Coachella is the fact that many of the attendees have their tickets bought for them by their parents.

Sorry? It’s not my fault that my parents have enough money to buy their daughter and her friends the gift of going to one of the most amazing melting pots of all things weird and beautiful. It’s not my fault about your life, and it’s none of your business about mine.

All my life, I’ve dealt with people commenting on me, mostly liking, but there are always a few that seem upset about the way I live my life.

One time, I was riding my dolphin out in Turks and Cacaos, (“riding” is the act of holding onto their fin as they swim and you sort of glide next to them. It’s a beautiful, transformative experience between human and animal and I really think, when I looked in my dolphin’s eye, that we made a connection that will last forever) and someone I knew threw shade my way for getting to do it.

Don’t make me be the bad guy.

I felt shame for years after my 16th birthday, where my parents got me an Escalade. People at school made fun of me (especially after I drove into a ditch...oops!) and said I didn’t deserve the things I got in life.

I can think of a lot of people who probably don't deserve the things in life that they get, but you don't hear me hating on them (that's why we vote, people). Well, I’m sick of being made to feel guilty about the luxuries I’m given, because they’ve made me who I am, and I love me.

I’m a good person.

I’m not going to let the Coachella haters bring me down anymore. Did my parents buy my ticket and VIP housing? Yes. Am I sorry about that? Absolutely not.

Sorry, not sorry!

Cover Image Credit: Kaycie Allen

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Unlike The Majority Of Millennials, I'm Rooting For Bella Thorne

Watch her Vogue documentary included in this article to see for yourself.

Bella Thorne recently released a documentary with Vogue, and I’d recommend that you watch it before reading this even though I’m only going to talk about the last 30 seconds.

Everyone is going to have their opinions on the way in which she chooses to carry herself. Maybe you think that she curses too much or that her outfits are too revealing. Maybe you think her boyfriend is weird and don’t understand why she would release a song that is basically her name on a loop. Many go as far as to say that she doesn’t deserve her fame. I personally have yet to watch any of her newer films or listen to her music. But I do see her on the DailyMail Snapchat every single day with endlessly absurd headlines. And after weeks of being updated on her every movement, I became weirdly invested in her.

While her behavior might be controversial, nobody can deny the fact that she is unapologetic.

Unapologetic is one of my favorite adjectives, because it’s a word that encompasses a person’s entire being. When you say that someone is funny, you are only capturing them at the surface level. Describing someone as unapologetic is saying that the person is fully and unabashedly themselves - even in the face of adversity. It makes a statement towards their character and is a word to work towards.

At the very end of the video, the interviewer asks if there is anything she’d like to say to the audience, to which she stops, looks into the camera, and says, “If you’re sitting here judging me, which you are. Everyone is. For one moment, just try and stop. Maybe like close your eyes and open them again. What do you see now?”

It created this really powerful moment where she shut out everyone else and is just staring at whoever happens to be watching. She is looking at every person who has ever made a negative comment about her and is asking them to see her as she is. For someone who is always on camera, it’s surprisingly raw, and suddenly you realize that she is just a 20-year-old girl trying to figure out her life like everyone else.

I am not writing this to be an advocate for every decision that Bella Thorne makes. I am writing this because I think the concept of individuality has become increasingly more skewed. Celebrities are most often praised for saying what everyone else is already thinking. And while it is admirable that they are choosing to use their platform to speak their minds, it seems that their personalities are being put into a box. They have to be funny, inspiring, charismatic and worldly all at the same time.

We set these impossible standards which then filters out of Hollywood. It seems as though our differences are only accepted if they are liked by the majority, and that’s not only unfair, but also boring. The most interesting people are the ones who simply are. People might say that Bella Thorne doesn’t deserve her fame, but she is still here, because people continue to follow her. And they do this because her openness is contagious and she motivates others not to be like her, but to be themselves.

Cover Image Credit: Wikipedia Commons

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