Yes, A Bad Work Environment Can Cause Multiple Issues-Including Your Relationship
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Yes, A Bad Work Environment Can Cause Multiple Issues-Including Your Relationship

“It took me finding a job that respected me, provided me with the opportunity to grow, and made me feel I contributed actual value to realize that ONE job could make or break the way I live my life.”

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Yes, A Bad Work Environment Can Cause Multiple Issues-Including Your Relationship

There was a period of time in my life where I felt very unhappy. I couldn't pin-point exactly what it was that made me feel this way though.

Was it my relationship?

Was it my daily routine?

My anxiety?

What could be causing me to go to bed with stress and wake up with even more?

I knew that it had to be something that played a constant roll in my life because I felt this "burden" every day. I felt this uneasiness like I wasn't happy or that I wanted something more. It continued for a really-really long time.

So when did I finally nail down what exactly was eating at me?

One day, a friend asked me to write down all the good things my job at the time provided me with.

Good money?

-No.

Coworkers that were good people and better friends?

-No.

An atmosphere that made me want to continue growing in that field?

-No.

A clear-cut path on how to continue moving up in my job?

-No.

A boss that respected me?

-Nope.

Experience for my resume?

-Pretty much…

It turns out, my job at the time was capable of not only ruining my day while working, but also burdened my relationship, my mental health, and my sleep, and I let it because I desperately wanted good experience for my career. This mattered to me SO much. I justified my health, sleep, relationship, life away from work-for this job.

Until one day, something in me just clicked. I woke up and realized I could not live another day being belittled.

I could not drive another drive that served me no point.

I felt like that perfectly served a metaphor for my life because every work day, I drove that same path to get to a place I never wanted to go. It took me a little longer than I'd hoped, but after my friend asked me those questions, I came to the conclusion that if I continued on this path, I'd spend all of my days just driving, never looking forward to the actual destination. That to me was a really sad way to live my life. The thought depressed me so much until I wrote down exactly what I wanted to say to the company I devoted a lot of my time to. I basically then broke up with this toxic partner I now refer to as my old job.

It took me finding a job that respected me, provided me with the opportunity to grow, and made me feel I contributed actual value to realize that ONE job could make or break the way I live my life.

When you finally stop to consider what all could change, just by changing your job-it's pretty amazing.

My relationship went from constant, petty, bickering after I got home, to separated time for the two of us to spend with one another talking about the good things that happened during our day, and ACTUALLY being able to look forward to what our night had in store for one another. It was very rare that I didn't bring my negative work day home with me. Looking back on it, I can see clearly how that would affect anyone's relationship.

My sleep schedule went from dreading having to get up in the morning to make the drive to a place I felt so depressed in, to looking forward to what the day offered me.

My time felt more valuable.

My relationship felt happier.

My mental status felt healthy for a change.

I could actually notice a difference in how I carried myself too. A lot of my decisions I made while working a job that I wasn't happy in-were irrational. I was "winging" everything because the repercussions didn't scare me. I carried myself with confidence after I left my toxic job. This played a number on my anxiety. I felt like I could breathe and the suffocation of the negative energy around me at my old job-just wasn't a constant and frequent thing anymore.

I very rarely looked forward to going home because I knew I'd just have to face the same job the next day-and that thought exhausted me.

I'm not saying my job was hard, and I'm not saying others' jobs weren't insanely more challenging than mine. I'm simply saying that I worked at a place that mentally abused and exhausted me. This place thrived on belittling the people around them. I was too young at the time to realize what that could do to a person and how it could negatively affect the rest of their life. Only seeing how I thrive now am I able to make the connection to how bad it really was before.

It is so insanely important to feel respected in your workplace. I think a lot of people don't take the time to consider how their job affects multiple aspects of their life-and not just one.

We dream of having a job that pays us well enough to live a happy lifestyle, but we can't live a happy lifestyle if the job that's giving us money makes us miserable. No matter how hard you try, that job that makes you feel like sh*t, can't pay you enough to actually be happy, nor can it give you enough experience to justify your mental health. You'll fight a much bigger battle with yourself to be happy than you ever would with money.

It takes being at the point of defeat with a job to understand that.

I'm so glad I no longer feel that defeat. The feeling of a calming work atmosphere is so much more rewarding than all the experience and money another job that demeans my mental health could offer me.

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