Signs of Domestic Violence
Start writing a post
Survivors

5 Unmistakable Signs That Someone You Know Is Experiencing Domestic Violence

They will not have to say a word for you to know.

53
domestic violence

Your friend is in a new relationship, and she is no longer herself. She no longer has that glimmer in her eyes, nor does she have her usual bright smile. You start to question what's wrong with her. Where did your friend go?

You may start to question your friendship and the future of it. She breaks off dates with you. She does not call you multiple times a day, and her texts are short and blunt.

You know something is wrong, so you ask her. Her response is, "Oh, it's nothing." But is it really nothing?

Domestic violence happens when you least expect it. It does not discriminate. Male or female, anyone can fall victim to such tragedy. How do you know when someone is going through such a thing? Are there obvious signs?

Often, there are behaviors that you would not normally pick up on. Unfortunately, most of us do not pay that much attention to others. But doing so might just save someone's life.

The following behaviors are just a few of the signs that someone you know may be suffering domestic violence.

They wear inappropriate clothes for the season.

In the summer, someone suffering domestic violence may wear heavy sweatshirts and sweatpants. Or they might wear hats that one normally wouldn't. These actions are to hide the marks and bruises that may be prominent on their bodies.

They are ashamed and think that if they cover the evidence, there won't be any questions asked.

So ask! You will be able to read the body language of your friend once you start questioning them.

They're suddenly a makeup expert.

Let's face it, not all women (or men) are makeup experts. Not everyone cares about makeup.

If your friend is not one to care for makeup and is loading it on all of a sudden, it's suspicious. Yes, there can be many logical reasons behind this. Maybe she finally knows how to do makeup and wants to show off her new skills.

Or maybe she has bruises on her eyes, cheeks and jaw but does not want you to know.

Having a conversation can tell you if you should be concerned. Give her a compliment about her makeup. If she is shy and just says "thanks," she could be hiding something.

Their personality is not the same as it was.

You can tell if your friend is different. Something has changed, but you can't pinpoint it. She seems distracted and withdrawn. Her care for everything has turned into care for nothing. She is always late for work, school and whatever else she does on a regular basis. You may have asked her many times if she is alright and she always says "yes."

You know it is a lie, but do not directly confront her. You should just offer a safe space to talk, then back off for the time being. Reminding them that you are still there goes a lot further than you think.

They're constantly on the phone.

Now I'm not talking about being on Facebook or playing games on their phone. I mean literally on the phone. You know, talking, that thing phones were originally made for.

Now, why might this be a sign? It is a sign of control.

If you are at work, and she's on the phone during every break she gets, this could be a problem. It may appear cute, but in reality, it is a red flag.

An abusive significant other cannot allow their partner to just socialize outside of work or school. By having them on the phone, the person on the other end gets to hear what is going on, limit contact with others and stay in control.

This is the one time you do not want to say anything. They will hear you, and it may make it worse.

They always make ridiculous excuses.

It's finals week at school, and your friend is nowhere to be found during your biology exam. You just talked to her yesterday. Where could she be?

You don't know it yet, but she is not coming to the exam. She has some foreign illness, or she witnessed a hero save someone, so she has to wait for the police to take her report.

These all sound a little far-fetched, right? They probably are.

Making absurd excuses is usually a good indicator that something more serious is going on.

You never want to corner someone you suspect is a victim of abuse. This may trigger them to act in a way you are not used to. When you have a window of opportunity, talk to them. But do it with caution.

Ask them questions. If they do not give you a real answer, then be blunt. Their reaction will tell you everything. They will not have to say a word for you to know.

If the abuse is present, your friend will need your love and support more than ever. If they decide they want to seek help or get away, be that rock. You would regret not helping if you read in the paper your friend was murdered at the hands of their abuser.

People cannot stand idly by when they know there is abuse. It just delays the inevitable. Talk. Get help. And show the world that bystanders still care.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
houses under green sky
Photo by Alev Takil on Unsplash

Small towns certainly have their pros and cons. Many people who grow up in small towns find themselves counting the days until they get to escape their roots and plant new ones in bigger, "better" places. And that's fine. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought those same thoughts before too. We all have, but they say it's important to remember where you came from. When I think about where I come from, I can't help having an overwhelming feeling of gratitude for my roots. Being from a small town has taught me so many important lessons that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.

Keep Reading...Show less
​a woman sitting at a table having a coffee
nappy.co

I can't say "thank you" enough to express how grateful I am for you coming into my life. You have made such a huge impact on my life. I would not be the person I am today without you and I know that you will keep inspiring me to become an even better version of myself.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

86746
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

52718
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments