To my loved ones,
Love is such an abstract thing. You think it's a fine line between love and hate, you have to feel butterflies, you have to say "I love you" to validate your feelings, and that you connect on a level that no one else has.
We tend to confuse certain situations for love as well. Sometimes you want someone to love so badly that you forget about what our own happiness even is because you need another person to validate your being. You will find sometimes that obsession is misinterpreted for love. You overlook their flaws, think that you can change them, or treat them like they'll never leave our sides no matter what outburst of rage. Sometimes you'll take physical and emotional blows, accept the fear and confusion, and convince yourself that he didn't mean to. You'll protect the one you love so much that even the friends we love and trust the most are pushed aside because they don't know him like you do, or they're just jealous of what you have. Your love is the only thing that matters above all else, right?
But what you need to realize is that maybe you're wrong. You think that love is simply this difficult journey to go through when it doesn't have to be that way. Aren't you tired of having to constantly validate your relationship because you're trying so hard to ignore all of the imperfections that are actually harming you?
A person cannot change for you. That is an act of self will. They must want to change, and change must come from within. You can give them a list of all the things that they need to do to become a better person, but that change is a demand from you. That change will never be permanent.
You need to realize is that there are almost 7.2 billion people in this world. While we think that there is "the one" out there, you still get to choose who you want to be with, and there are so many people in this world that you'll meet in your life. No one deserves to be in a relationship that causes confusion, hurt, and lies.
Love is genuine happiness that you build with another person. You validate each other through honesty, loyalty, trust, and unconditional acceptance of who they are. You should never feel that any of these traits should ever be compromised or disrespected. You're not meant to hurt this way because someone who loves you respects you enough to know not to hurt you.
Love isn't supposed to be perfect either. No love is perfect. You will have to overcome challenges together through teamwork and determination. You have to acknowledge that it isn't always going to be roses and daisies. But again, there is a fine line between loving someone so much that it hurts, and loving someone who hurts you.
And sometimes, the one you love might not be the one you're meant to be with.
Think about this next time you feel doubt, question your self worth, or need to find answers in your relationship. And remember, you are loved no matter what.
