This Hatred in Certain Hearts

Growing up, I do not think I really understood what hatred was. I did not experience this sort of feeling from anyone actually. I would go to elementary school, play with my friends, fill in the blanks to complete sentences, and take the school bus back home.

When I moved to Pakistan with my mother sister and brother is when I saw a different side of living. People were teased for having ripped clothes or asking for money. There were nokars also known as "servants" who were as old as my grandfather picking up after someone who I am very sure appeared to have two hands and was fairly young. I still did not know what hatred was or if these things even qualified as hatred.

I have experienced a lot of love growing up and even now. I mean, I am sure someone has cursed me here and there probably has a voodoo doll of me, but overall, from the people who matter most to me, it has been love. I know this feeling, the feeling of being loved mainly.

I realize now, with living in this society and being under this "president" what hatred actually is. When I think of hatred, I start to think of Donald Trump thinking it is okay to turn away immigrants and him telling the police it is okay to be rough when arresting someone and putting them in a cop car.

Hatred, the way some people view Muslims, how they glare at Muslim women wearing hijab. It is so odd to me and will always be. All I have ever known when it comes to hijab is kindness, that is the word I associate with it. My best friend has worn hijab for as long as I can remember. I don't know her without it, it is literally apart of her and something she proudly wears. I can't even fathom stories about "girls hijab being ripped off as she was walking to the subway" because this sort of heart full of evil hatred will never make sense to me.

The hatred where a mother kills her husband and 5 children, all under the age of 10 and shows up in court, smiling and laughing and giving thumbs up to the cameras. What sort of hatred is this? Can it even be categorized?

Is this type of hatred instilled in some people? Can a person be born with hatred? Do certain experiences turn some into monsters?

Where is the hatred derived from?