In An Astonishing Turn of Events, Having 'Feminine' Soft Skills Is Actually More Advantageous In the Workplace
Are women taking even more space than they should?!
I'm not saying technical or hard skills are vital for you. I'm just saying that they are something that is easier to obtain than soft skills. We have been training all our lives to learn the technical skills that we need to perform in the workplace but it is the soft skills that keep us successful.
If we think about it, the classes that we are doing right now will not be used in our future unless of course, it is something really specific that we have to know for our future career but the connections we make is going to get us far in life.
It's not about the college name that you go to but the people you know and the network you build that makes or breaks your future success.
Research from the National Soft Skills Association reports that 85% of job success comes from having well-developed soft skills.
But what are soft skills and how can you obtain them? Soft skills are more social than technical and reflect a person's ability to accept feedback, maintain organization, problem solve, and collaborate with others.
Think of it this way: no matter how good you are at your job, people won't like you if you can't play well with others.
To survive in this economy is only possible if you have the skills to make yourself invaluable to your employer and that means that they have to like you.
Anyone can study and accumulate knowledge that is technical and material heavy, but the reason that people become managers, CEOs, and presidents are not because they are the smartest person in the room but the one people come to get stuff accomplished.
Do you know those people who seem to know everybody? They surprisingly know people from your major, they know other people who are so nice to them, and they have a personal story with each one of them. They always know the best people to talk to about an issue (even if they don't know them personally).
They probably have a gazillion streaks on Snapchat but not in the fake way of not talking and just sending streaks. They are the person you go to make stuff happen because they know someone who can get it done for you.
Or, perhaps you have a friend who is the go-to person for advice. Everyone (including you!) is comfortable talking to them. Ok, don't lie. You thought of a female friend here. It's okay. So did I. That's the point of this article actually.
These people have wonderful soft skills. It's not relevant whether they're the smartest person in the room: They're comfortable interacting with others and others feel good interacting with them.
And isn't that true? Don't you feel like you can connect with this person on a deep level? Being around them is stress-free because you feel comfortable in their presence.
On the other hand, there is that friend that doesn't play well with others. When you introduce them to someone new, you have to make sure to tell them to "be nice" because you don't know what kind of impression they are going to make on the new person.
That friend doesn't really have the soft skills that they should have and thus, compensate for it in different ways like acting out or making uncomfortable jokes to fit in and then say that it is just an aspect of their personality that you must accept.
We all know both of these people but generally, most individuals are a mixture of both of them in different situations with different people.
Usually, women are burdened with accommodating for those who don't have the best soft skills by being mindful of their boundaries when people just walk all over the woman.
Soft skills are something that is seen as weaker than hard skills because they are considered feminine (and gosh, isn't this yet another thing that makes you endlessly frustrated and make you want to go watch Carol Danvers beat more people up?) because from the moment girls are born, they are expected to not only have a good handle on their emotions, unless they want to be called "crybabies", but also to be nice, smile, and allow the others around them to make excuses for their own terrible emotional intelligence because of course, logic trumps emotions.
And if women do not do that? They are considered to be a "bitch" because they walk the world the way a man is praised for.
The double standard for women is what most women fight against as it creates a bind of being approachable enough to talk to but not someone you would take orders from.
"Historically in the workplace, there has been a tendency for women to self-evaluate themselves as less competent, while men tend to overrate themselves in their competencies," said Boyatzis, Ph.D., Distinguished University Professor, Case Western Reserve University. "Research shows, however, that the reality is often the opposite. If more men acted like women in employing their emotional and social competencies, they would be substantially and distinctly more effective in their work."
Since information is so easy to obtain, so many people have the tools to do the same job but the distinguishing factor is how they behave while doing it. Soft skills are increasingly becoming the hard skills of today's workforce.
Gosh, are you telling me that women have the advantage now because we were brainwashed to be more empathetic since childhood? Women having advantages just because of being women? Is this how a man feels like on the daily?
Ultimately, while your technical skills may get your foot in the door, your people skills are what open most of the doors to come.
