Lifestyle
How To Manage And Tame Your Curly Hair In The Summer Heat
Is it even possible?
29 July 2019
1363
Pexels
You can't, you just can't. Nothing works, so just throw it up in a messy bun and look homeless all summer.
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1. Pro: Great weather year round
2. Con: The Summer heat
3. Pro: Sunsets
4. Con: No white Christmas
5. Pro: The beach
6. Con: Hurricanes
7. Pro: Disney World
8. Con: Snow birds
9. Pro: Golf courses
10. Con: We don't get to experience the seasons
11. Pro: No need to shovel now
Yet, here you all are, sitting by the pool, drinking your appletinis and looking like you just stepped out of the swimsuit cover of Sports Illustrated.
Now, I'm 21 years young, so I stopped being mad about the differences between us a long time ago. Now, I just want answers, plain and simple. Here are just a few of the questions that I would like explained.
1. How do you not sweat?
This is me trying to casually wipe away the rivers streaming down my face every time I step outside. How do you not sweat literally ever? It's a normal body function to do so, yet you all seem to have skipped over that part in the womb.
And don't tell me, "Oh, silly, of course I sweat!" because I'm calling bull-doody right now. I saw you take out that spray bottle to spritz yourself and to create the illusion that you sweat just enough to simply glisten, Cheryl.
2. Where yo sunscreen at?
GiphyI just got off of my fourth summer as a lifeguard. From my first day to my very last, I put on a solid SPF 50 Coppertone every 80 minutes, as directed. I still burned at least once a week.
However, I look at all these hot people, lazing out in the sun for HOURS on end, and all they do is turn a delightful shade of cinnamon toast, no post-sun aloe sesh needed.
What do you do, huh? You soak in a tub full of sunscreen for an hour before you go out into the sun? Or is your skin just genetically predisposed to deflect UV Rays after it retains the needed amount for tanning?
Also, are tan lines just not a thing in Hot People Land? Asking for a friend (that friend is me).
3. Your hair. Just. . .what?
Your. Hair. Is. Impossibly. Flawless. Who are you, freaking Pocahontas? What are your colors of the wind, and where on this good, green world can I get some?
While we're on the subject, what in the heck is a beach wave? Your hair is curly without actually being curly. It's so wavy and non-frizzy and magical. I legit don't get it. Did you make a deal with the devil?
4. How do you make sitting with your mouth slightly open look awesome?
What's this about? You look so seductive and put together. Guaranteed that if I tried to do this, I would look like a mouth-breathing idiot pretending to be a very attractive vampire. The overall result would be quite gross, if not downright terrifying.
Are you smiling? Are you strategically frowning? Are you growling? Like, what is going on? Why is it working? I just want to know.
5. What's the move with the sand?
Sand is evil.
There, I said it. It gets in crevices I didn't know I had and it's itchy. I can never seem to lay on it comfortably and forget using my towel afterwards.
However, you all have managed to tame the sand monster and make it look like a cloud of sparkling beach diamonds that you happened upon and decided to lie across.
Do I need to make a sacrifice to the sand monster? Is it all in the strategic half leg cross move? I need to know.
I expect answers, hot people. You have hacked the summer system, and I need to know the secret. Otherwise, I may suffocate underneath sweat, frizzy hair, sand, and other tropical implements.
I await your reply anxiously and in the air conditioning.
Sincerely
Literally everyone. We all want to know your secrets.
Let me just inform you about things that I learned from being in Houston this summer.
One of the biggest things that Houston is known for is its humidity. It makes it so hot that you cannot go outside. The humidity kills you and your hair. I would do my hair so it would look perfect, then the moment I step outside it looks like I haven't brushed it. So I just throw my hair up in a ponytail and call it a day.
You will sweat. Everyone will sweat. You just have to admit this and go about your day. There is no way to prevent it.
The other terrible thing about Houston is the bipolar weather. It would be beautiful sunny in the morning, then at 1:30 p.m. there is a downpour. I am not talking about a nice summer rainfall. NOPE. It is a crazy storm where you can't see out the window, and it's even worse when you're driving. One second you can see and then the next you are blinded by the rain. If anyone has any advice what to do with this weather, please let me know.
I grew up in a small town, so I am still getting used to this huge city. I am used to cities like Boston or Washington D.C., but Houston is just another level when it comes from a city. People don't lie when they "everything is bigger in Texas." Since the city is so big you need to drive and there is no public transportation.
The drivers in Houston are the absolute worst. I am confused because what about southern hospitality? For real, people do not care. They just swerve lanes. Nothing close to having a southern hospitality.
With all those negative things about Houston, it really is not as bad as people make it out to be. I am just bitter that I am not laying on the beach now. Houston is very diverse in their culture and food. They have a lot of museums, parks, and different activities. And it is an only an hour from Galveston.
Galveston is not the nicest beach, but the water is really warm. You just have to overlook the color. It's a nice spot since I miss being on the beach. It will fulfill the need for the salty water and air.
Houston has so many options for dinner it is difficult to decide. And their Tex-Mex is to die for. They have Italian, American, and any type of food you are in the mood for. The food trucks are surprisingly good.
The location is not bad for being Texas. It is about an hour from Galveston, 2 hours from Austin, and 3 hours from Dallas.
They have free play at an outdoor theater, which is a great way to spend a Friday night. Or there are a couple of parks if you can survive being outside.
There is a lot of shopping, and I am lucky enough to work right next to the Galleria. This is a huge mall that has a lot of nice stores. Most of the time I just window shop. Also, Rice Village has a lot of upper scale boutiques that are really nice to look at until you see the price tag.
Downtown Houston has some nice rooftop bars that are fun to hang out with friends. Some have games to play so if you are competitive, you can make it an interesting match.
Overall, Houston is not nearly as bad as people make it out to be. The biggest thing is if you get over the humidity and traffic, then Houston is a great city. Houston is very diverse in everything that it has to offer.
1. You can't be in your house during the day
I don't know about you, but sitting in a living room that is 85 degrees is not my idea of fun. It's just not worth it to be inside on hot days because it feels a bit like living in a sauna, so Seattleites tend to migrate outdoors for any sort of solace.
2. You have all of your fans on full blast at all times
All of your fans are strategically placed around the house in order to maintain some sort of air flow. Even if it's just moving the hot air around, it's better than nothing.
3. You have to perfectly time when to open the windows
They absolutely have to be open all night (with a fan in the window, of course), but as soon as it starts getting warm out you have to shut them to avoid letting all the hot air inside. It's a delicate system, but getting it right changes everything.
4. Swimming in the lakes saves your life
Seattle is full of cold lakes perfect for the hot days when you can't be inside. There's no better way to cool off than going for a swim.
5. You have places you go specifically for the air conditioning
There are certain cafes and restaurants in Seattle that bless us with air conditioning, and you better believe we know exactly where they are and go there as a last resort when it's too hot to be outside and too stifling indoors.
