When Coming Out Goes Wrong
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Politics and Activism

Poetry On Odyssey: Awhile

A poem written for my ex-best friend who couldn't handle my coming out to him as a lesbian.

Poetry On Odyssey: Awhile

"Awhile" has left what's left of my security

Because the comfort of our intimacy never seemed to be a luxury

Under your influence I found a safe spot of proximity

Laced by friendship to the group who felt entitled to my sovereignty

Our connection was beveled by acceptance and sincerity

A safe haven forged from assurance and validity

But since our link has been broken, and it happened so suddenly

The past, like a siren, sings out old insecurities:

I am made in the image of man

I'm property of men for they choose it to be

I am is secondary

Should wait tongue bore and cheeks splayed in obligation to society

You're the disappointment of the century

My perceptions of social maturity not all they cracked up to be

Instead they hung back, incubating my original uncertainty

I'd never suspect you'd introduce me to the pain of my community

For lacking the same piety

Which kept me lugging behind the barge

And wading across the murky waters of identity

Right when I started to think that boat was finally behind me

Today, I'm retrospectively pining for the misinterpreted purity I associated with you and me

I'm desperate for a foothold in the confidence that you had a hand in expanding then dismembering

I'll miss you

Cause right from point A you had always been beside me

But all the lefts I had to take to finally feel right hadn't yet factored in your impression of destiny

With that mistake I'm barely one leap forward and two steps back from where I was initially

I want to scream, "Wasn't my love enough, even though it comes from a different mentality?"

But I know communication can't be had when we were too close for comfort to our inevitable point B's

At which we're together forever at an impasse, separated indefinitely, and alone for awhile

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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