Outrageous: It Still Isn't Halloween
Start writing a post
Politics and Activism

Outrageous: It Still Isn't Halloween

128
Outrageous: It Still Isn't Halloween

Yes, you read that correctly. Halloween STILL has not come.

89.2% of Americans agree that Halloween is their favorite holiday and that all other nationally-acknowledged holidays pale in comparison. However, only 2.7% of America realizes that Halloween is still two months away. Apparently Halloween is being celebrated on October 31, 2015. I am writing this article on August 29, 2015. Since there is the entire month of September between August and October, we still have two months more before the sweet, sweet day arrives. No disrespect, but I think those statistics are spookier than any costume I saw last year. And not in a fun way.

As our days stretch endlessly before us, one haunting question remains: why is no one addressing this? As you can tell by the aforementioned dates and this calendar, it is 2015! How is it, in this day and age, that we still have elected politicians who are too afraid to start a national dialogue about this?

People of the internet, it’s up to us to spark a movement. I encourage you all to write letters to your governor imploring her or him to become more vocal about this issue. In my opinion, the state of politics would be highly improved if stances on legalizing a Halloween for the people and by the people were included as keystone talking points for all future political campaigns.

Where did fairness go? How can I believe that America can be salvaged? I pay taxes! What is going ON?!

My dear reader, I don’t necessarily know who you are, but I bet you’ve had some tough times lately. I also bet your blues would be assuaged by a few extra Halloweens throughout the year.

Think of it; the slight chill is back in the breeze, the air is thick with adventure, sweet fun-sized treats flow from the hands of kind strangers, and adrenaline dances through your veins as you wonder about the costumed fiends that may be hiding right around the corner. For the first time in a long time, you feel alive.

We’ve waited an eternity for Halloween to come back, so it must be tomorrow, right? WRONG. Because our government doesn’t care about us whatsoever. Participation in Halloween is the foundation of mental health. Humans need socialization. Socialization occurs at parties. Halloween has parties. The more parties you go to, the more costume compliments you will receive. I know my “Sexy Dead Pig from SAW” costume from last year was obscenely under-appreciated. I need more Halloween, and you need more Halloween.

I’m a simple woman and I would NEVER try to start unnecessary drama. But honestly, living in a world with only one Halloween per year makes me want to jump atop a blazing funeral pyre.

I know that it may be shocking news to hear that it’s still not Halloween, but you don’t need to cope in silence. I’m starting a Kickstarter so you can donate to my cause. Also feel free to start using the hashtag #constantHalloween in your tweets.

It’s time to wake up, America.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Student Life

Top 10 Reasons My School Rocks!

Why I Chose a Small School Over a Big University.

103700
man in black long sleeve shirt and black pants walking on white concrete pathway

I was asked so many times why I wanted to go to a small school when a big university is so much better. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure a big university is great but I absolutely love going to a small school. I know that I miss out on big sporting events and having people actually know where it is. I can't even count how many times I've been asked where it is and I know they won't know so I just say "somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin." But, I get to know most people at my school and I know my professors very well. Not to mention, being able to walk to the other side of campus in 5 minutes at a casual walking pace. I am so happy I made the decision to go to school where I did. I love my school and these are just a few reasons why.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lots of people sat on the cinema wearing 3D glasses
Pinterest

Ever wonder what your friend meant when they started babbling about you taking their stapler? Or how whenever you ask your friend for a favor they respond with "As You Wish?" Are you looking for new and creative ways to insult your friends?

Well, look no further. Here is a list of 70 of the most quotable movies of all time. Here you will find answers to your questions along with a multitude of other things such as; new insults for your friends, interesting characters, fantastic story lines, and of course quotes to log into your mind for future use.

Keep Reading...Show less
New Year Resolutions

It's 2024! You drank champagne, you wore funny glasses, and you watched the ball drop as you sang the night away with your best friends and family. What comes next you may ask? Sadly you will have to return to the real world full of work and school and paying bills. "Ah! But I have my New Year's Resolutions!"- you may say. But most of them are 100% complete cliches that you won't hold on to. Here is a list of those things you hear all around the world.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

The Ultimate Birthday: Unveiling the Perfect Day to Celebrate!

Let's be real, the day your birthday falls on could really make or break it.

44633
​different color birthday candles on a cake
Blacksburg Children's Museum

You heard it here first: birthdays in college are some of the best days of your four years. For one day annually, you get to forget about your identity as a stressed, broke, and overworked student, and take the time to celebrate. You can throw your responsibilities for a day, use your one skip in that class you hate, receive kind cards and gifts from loved ones and just enjoy yourself.

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

Unleash Inspiration: 15 Relatable Disney Lyrics!

Leave it to Disney to write lyrics that kids of all ages can relate to.

78617
The 15 most inspiring Disney songs

Disney songs are some of the most relatable and inspiring songs not only because of the lovable characters who sing them, but also because of their well-written song lyrics. While some lyrics make more sense with knowledge of the movie's story line that they were written for, other Disney lyrics are very relatable and inspiring for any listener.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments