I'm sure you've heard those feel-good quotes concerning beauty and maybe even said one or two of them yourself at one point.

"You're beautiful just the way you are."

"Beauty is in the eye of the beholder."

"Everybody is beautiful."

While these quotes may temporarily boost self-esteem, they can at times be blatant lies. Not everyone is beautiful, and that's okay. Science will tell you that this is true and if you are really honest with yourself, you might admit it as well. Maybe you see it when you look in the mirror or when you look around the room. So why are we so afraid of being "ugly" or even "average?"

In a culture that puts so much emphasis on physical attraction, it's no wonder people (namely women) are striving to be "beautiful" and spending almost $4000 a year on appearance. Now, nothing is wrong with taking care of your physical self so you look and feel confident at your personal best, but is beauty really the end-all of qualities?

Out of all the traits people can possess, beauty seems to be the one everyone is entitled to. We never hear, "you're intelligent just the way you are" or "everybody is athletic." That would be ridiculous. Instead, people want to be beautiful, because beauty is like currency in today's culture. People who are beautiful are perceived as more intelligent, possessing more goodness, you name it. We long to hear the word in any form it may come in. "You're beautiful on the inside." We don't tell people they're "athletic on the inside," so why beautiful? It's time we start saying things that make sense and are true, such as "you're kind" or "you're smart" or "you're generous." These words are much more meaningful than "beautiful," since that word has lost its true value, as it's freely handed to everyone.

Although it's wonderful to be truly, physically "beautiful," might it be that we're looking in the wrong areas for validation? If everyone is beautiful, then no one is. Not everyone is physically attractive, and that's totally fine. The lack of physical beauty should not hinder someone from living a happy, fulfilling life. Beauty is like any other privilege, something that is not earned, but it's given or inherited. So yes, people who aren't beautiful might have it harder in certain areas of life. I believe you can still live your best life (and an even better life than many beautiful people) without being conventionally beautiful.

The problem with movements that tell everyone they're beautiful is that they're reinforcing the idea that beauty equates to worth. In my opinion, that is actually a very negative and disempowering message, the opposite of what these movements are masquerading as. Saying someone is not beautiful is not saying that they're undeserving of love, respect, or happiness. It's simply a casual observation, such as "she does not have brown hair." We've put so much value in beauty that we tear ourselves down if we feel ugly or don't bother being friends with someone because they don't match our standard of beauty. Our overemphasis of this trait has been detrimental to self-esteem, leaving people feeling worthless if they aren't conventionally beautiful.

I'm not going to end this post by telling you you're beautiful just the way you are. Because maybe you're not. I'm going to end this post by telling you that you may not be beautiful, but that's okay. You don't need to be beautiful to be successful, have confidence, earn respect, have friends, deserve love, find happiness, and have value and worth as a human being. I'm not going to tell you that "beauty comes from within," but I want you to know that kindness, integrity, compassion, and courage are far greater traits than beauty. You are worthy and important just the way you are, beautiful or not.