I'm so tired of one-sided friendships. I'm tired of having them, I'm tired of seeing my friends go through them, I'm tired of listening to people come to me for advice about them, I'm just tired.
Listen, I know people get busy. But in the world of social media and FaceTime and Snapchat, it is not that hard to contact someone. Especially if that someone is your "friend".
It makes my heart hurt to hear stories of friendships that faded away because only one person was putting in any effort. Friendship is a two-way relationship. That's how they work.
Yet I hear story after story of friendships that consist of one person always reaching out first, always making plans to hang out and always being available for the other person.
And it's more common that it should be. Even I have a friend that the only way we talk is if I call them. The only time we hang out is when I suggest it. And it's exhausting and it's hurtful.
You can't claim to be a friend if you don't make any effort. You don't get to be excited about seeing me if you never make an effort to do so. And that's what hurts about the situation. A "friend" would be doing all of those things but sometimes it just doesn't work out that way.
It's a tough situation to be in. And when faced with it, it's hard to move on from said friendship because they do still communicate, they do want to hang out, but only if you do the work. No one wants to cut off a friendship but at some point it will come to that with one-sided relationships.
My advice to everyone, and myself, is to really evaluate the relationship. Reach out and say "hey it really bothers me that you don't ever seem to think of me", have that conversation. Maybe it will go well, they'll apologize, they'll start to reach out first. But maybe it won't. And if it doesn't, then you have the reason to end the friendship.
So to everyone out there in one-sided friendships, I'm sorry. It's a crappy feeling and a crappy situation and you deserve better. But reach out and then you'll know if they also value you as a friend and make a decision from there. And if you ever need someone to send you cute animal pictures, I got you.
