I don't know what to write about anymore. It's not that I don't want to write; it's just that I really don't know what to say anymore. Every single week I put out another article on Odyssey, and every week I feel like my content is becoming less and less interesting. I feel like I have to create something that's going to get as many views as possible, but I have to confess that I don't always care about the views. Sometimes I just felt good enough with having my thoughts written down and my mind cleared up. In the end, I'm going to be okay whether or not I get 500 views or only 5. But that's not to undermine any other Odyssey writer who strives for such goals. In fact I say more power to them because they work hard for it.
This is not just an Odyssey issue. It is plainly just one big umbrella issue that is extending into all areas of my life. I have a hard time writing for class now too. I always know what I need to say, but I never know how to say it. So I pretty much get stuck with writer's block for several hours until I can gather the strength to put out something at least mediocre/passing. Even now as I write this I am just trying to get to the bare minimum to express how I feel. But maybe that speaks more than the words themselves. Maybe my lack of ingenious wordplay and eye-grabbing content says more about what I am trying to say. And what I'm trying to say is this: writing is hard for me now.
I don't know if it's because I have exhausted all of my ideas, or if I am just losing my mind. But I'm starting to feel like writing is becoming such a chore. I am supposed to like writing, or at least I did for such a long time. I want to be able to write better in all areas of my life, but I don't know when or where to start. Not to mention that I really want to write fiction one day. Oh boy, that's the other struggle; having a bunch of stories and ideas in my head but never the patience or will to sit down and write it without having writer's block.
I don't know, maybe saying all of this will help me get past it all. Maybe it will make it worse. Again, I just don't know; I know that I want to work hard in class, I know that I want to stay in Odyssey. I know that I want to write stuff that I'm proud of. But I also don't know; I don't know how to get there, and I don't know how to be as good at it as everyone else is. I either need new inspiration or a break. As I finish up this piece I can't help but ramble because at this point I have said everything I have wanted to. As of now, my mind is clear and I don't know what to add. Perhaps I should just say that I hope none of you have to deal with this. At least not for too long. It's frustrating, infuriating, and inconvenient. I hate having this writer's block.
