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18 John Mulaney Quotes To Use With Your Best Friends Every Day To 'Throw Them Off Their Rythym'

"STREET SMARTS"

Shelby Davis

Feb 20, 2019

University of Virginia

4336

18 John Mulaney Quotes To Use With Your Best Friends Every Day To 'Throw Them Off Their Rythym'

John Mulaney Instagram

John Mulaney is definitely one of the funniest stand-up comedians for college students across the nation. He is very relatable and incredibly funny for everyone. I know my friends and quote him every single day if something sounds the slightest bit familiar to something he has said during his stand up shows.

1. "Huh, what?

2. "You have the moral backbone of a chocolate eclair."

3. "You seeing this shit? You seeing this Home Alone 2: Lost in New York shit?"

4. "I'll keep all of my emotions right here...then one day I'll die."

5. "Because Bill Clinton never forgets a bitch."

6. "College is just your opinion."

7. "One black coffee, same mother fucker."

8. "What is college? Stop going until we figure it out!"

9. "If I get some fries for the table will you have some? Will you have some fries...OH I KNOW YOU'LL HAVE SOME!"

10. "Fun mom energy."

11. "So you could say I already gave them $120,000!"

12. "I will pepper in the fact that I am gay for backstory."

13. "You want me to do what?"

14. "In terms of instant relief, canceling plans is like heroin."

15. "I'm new in town."

16. "Hey, can I walk you home?"

17. "Because we're Delta Airlines and life is a f***ing nightmare."

18. "You know like when you eat too much chocolate cake?"

These may seem very hard to work into conversation, but I promise it is much easier than you think! These will definitely make for some great memories and laughs with your friends.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.

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18 John Mulaney Quotes To Use With Your Best Friends Every Day To 'Throw Them Off Their Rythym'

"STREET SMARTS"

1. "Huh, what?

2. "You have the moral backbone of a chocolate eclair."

3. "You seeing this shit? You seeing this Home Alone 2: Lost in New York shit?"

4. "I'll keep all of my emotions right here...then one day I'll die."

5. "Because Bill Clinton never forgets a bitch."

6. "College is just your opinion."

7. "One black coffee, same mother fucker."

8. "What is college? Stop going until we figure it out!"

9. "If I get some fries for the table will you have some? Will you have some fries...OH I KNOW YOU'LL HAVE SOME!"

10. "Fun mom energy."

11. "So you could say I already gave them $120,000!"

12. "I will pepper in the fact that I am gay for backstory."

13. "You want me to do what?"

14. "In terms of instant relief, canceling plans is like heroin."

15. "I'm new in town."

16. "Hey, can I walk you home?"

17. "Because we're Delta Airlines and life is a f***ing nightmare."

18. "You know like when you eat too much chocolate cake?"

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75 degrees and sunny, plus, no humidity. I mean do I really need to say more?

Perfect Weather

You'll get an effortless tan

You can exercise with a view

You don't have to worry about bug bites

In n Out all day, every day

We have outdoor concerts

We live where people vacation

Because let's be honest, we all use lyrics.

1. “Don’t get too close, it’s dark inside. It's where my demons hide.”

2. “Tonight, we are young.”

3. “Cuz I may be bad, but I’m perfectly good at it.”

4. “Tell me how they got that pretty little face on that pretty little frame.”

5. “I can’t wait to fall in love with you, you can’t wait to fall in love with me.”

6. “Sweatpants, hair tied, chillin with no makeup on.”

7. “Why you so obsessed with me?”

8. “We ain’t ever getting older.”

9. “I didn’t know that I was starving until I tasted you.”

10. “Didn’t they tell you I’m a savage?"

11. “I’m gonna make you miss me.”

12. "Cheers to the freakin weekend.”

13. “Love’s a game. Wanna play?”

14. “You don’t know about me, but I bet you want to.”

15. “Let’s set each other’s lonely nights, Be each other’s paradise.”

16. “Trippin’ on skies, sippin’ waterfalls."

17. “Wish we could turn back time, to the good old days.”

18. “But you will remember me for centuries.”

19. “Something about you makes me feel like a dangerous woman."

20. “Don’t act like it’s a bad thing to fall in love with me.”

21. “Darling, I’m a nightmare dressed like a daydream.”

22. “Find me where the wild things are.”

23. “I’m high on lovin’ you.”

24. “If you’re gonna be somebody’s heartbreak, somebody’s mistake, if you’re gonna be somebody’s first time, somebody’s last time, be mine.”

25. “Don’t be afraid to take the road less traveled on.”

Everything Bruce says in his classic rock songs.

1. "Talk about a dream Try to make it real You wake up in the night With a fear so real Spend your life waiting For a moment that just don't come Well don't waste your time waiting." (Badlands)

2. "It's a town full of losers/ I'm pulling out of here to win" (Thunder Road)

3. "You've got to learn to live with what you can't rise above" (Tunnel of Love)

4. "I got something in my heart/ I been waitin' to give/ I got a life I wanna start/ One I been waitin' to live" (Leah)

5. “God have mercy on the man/ Who doubts what he’s sure of” (Brilliant Disguise)

7. “Is a dream a lie when it don’t come true, or is it something worse?” (The River)

Why you should spend your next summer in New England.

Nature is beautiful (and so is math). The last one will blow your mind.

1. Shells

2. Trees

3. Flower Pistils

4. Flower Petals

5. Leaves

6. Storms

7. You!

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1. "Talk about a dream
Try to make it real
You wake up in the night
With a fear so real
Spend your life waiting
For a moment that just don't come
Well don't waste your time waiting." (Badlands)