I remember the feeling when I graduated from high school. I almost immediately had a sense of sadness, just because I knew I was going to a different college than my friends, and not seeing them every day would be difficult, but what I mostly felt was excitement. Knowing that I was going to be starting the next chapter in my life, and experiencing a freedom I had never had was overwhelming in the best way. The thing I never thought would end (grade school) was actually over, and had gone quicker than expected.

First thing is first, college goes fifty times faster than high school does. In the fall of my senior year, all I could think about was graduating, and that same sense of excitement came all over again. But now, having just finished my graduate school applications, I think what I feel more than anything is fear.

I knew college after high school was the right decision for me, and I found comfort in that certainty. Now, however, I feel quite unsure of most things. I love school, but wonder if I should give up more of my life to it right now. On the other hand, the alternative is the nine to five job (which for me, sounds like a nightmare).

I see the people from high school getting married, buying houses, and getting that job. For me, it feels so far from where I am supposed to be, but finding that where I am supposed to be is proving to be really difficult.

Not only that, but once I graduate, I will be completely self-supporting myself, and my head feels much to in the clouds and not yet ready to throw away the dreams to be able to hunker down in a house, or by signing a lease, and tying myself to an agreement that I never wanted to make in the first place.

I am at that point where the next steps do not follow an obvious path, and being at this point in my life where my future is finally in the palm of my hands is utterly terrifying.

So I hope for your sake, when you get to where I am, you have a little more clarity than I do, and if you don't, good luck. I'm right there with you.