Gossip Girl's Eric Van Der Woodsen Was A Gift Unto This World
Start writing a post

Gossip Girl's Eric Van Der Woodsen Was A Gift Unto This World

A manifesto.

Gossip Girl's Eric Van Der Woodsen Was A Gift Unto This World

Sure, Serena killed some dude, and sure, the entire premise of the show is stalking. But the real crime on Gossip Girl is the lack of screentime dedicated to Eric van der Woodsen. "That show has been over since 2012," I hear you say. Then let it be a tribute to Eric that it's been four years and my heart still beats for him.

You can tell me that this show is an absolute trainwreck of storytelling, and I'll be the first to howl in agreement. You can ask how I can in good conscience root for Chuck and Blair, and I will put my hands over my ears and ignore you. But don't you dare say one word against the criminally underutilized character that is Eric van der Woodsen.

He is the moral compass, the heart and soul of this convoluted show. You could argue that the same could be said of Dorota, and I would agree. The difference is that Dorota gets her fair share of appreciation, while everyone (including the writers) ignore Eric. You don't have a snowball's chance in hell (or a Jenny Humphrey's chance at Constance amirite) of seeing him two episodes in a row. Sometimes it's explained: oh he's off in Gstaad with a boyfriend. Classic Eric.

Often, though, he's not even acknowledged, because the episode just has to fit in a subplot about Rufus making waffles (But Jenny rejects the waffles, and Dan is being too smug and self-congratulatory to eat the waffles. Poor Rufus, I weep for him so.). For a show tag-lined "Every Parent's Worst Nightmare," "Gossip Girl" sure spends a staggering amount of time on the parents, from Chuck's endless mama drama (is this mysterious woman Chuck's mother? Is that one? How about her?) to Nate's boring dad's boring embezzlement scandal to Rufus and Lily's Baby Boomer romance. If Eric got even half the screen time the parents did, it would have been an infinitely better show.

Eric says what the viewer is thinking. In his rare onscreen moments, his searing one-liners give me a flash of hope that maybe the people behind "Gossip Girl" had just an ounce of self-awareness and humor.

And can we just acknowledge what a compelling main character he would have been: he’s a van der Woodsen, for heaven’s sake. He’s a blue-blooded schemer with at least as many problems as his sister Serena. And come on, the tortured gay teen trope was like catnip to mid-2000s TV. So where was Eric’s story arch, executive producer Josh Schwartz? Where was it? Instead of being the center of the action, Eric was relegated to being Jenny Humphrey’s GBF.

Break free of her her devil grip, my sweet prince.

Maybe I’ll break into the presidential race and my platform will be that America needs an Eric-centric "Gossip Girl" spinoff. Or maybe I’ll just re-watch all his scenes—it won’t take me very long.

So pensive. Such rumination. What's going on in that beautiful mind?

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
the beatles
Wikipedia Commons

For as long as I can remember, I have been listening to The Beatles. Every year, my mom would appropriately blast “Birthday” on anyone’s birthday. I knew all of the words to “Back In The U.S.S.R” by the time I was 5 (Even though I had no idea what or where the U.S.S.R was). I grew up with John, Paul, George, and Ringo instead Justin, JC, Joey, Chris and Lance (I had to google N*SYNC to remember their names). The highlight of my short life was Paul McCartney in concert twice. I’m not someone to “fangirl” but those days I fangirled hard. The music of The Beatles has gotten me through everything. Their songs have brought me more joy, peace, and comfort. I can listen to them in any situation and find what I need. Here are the best lyrics from The Beatles for every and any occasion.

Keep Reading...Show less
Being Invisible The Best Super Power

The best superpower ever? Being invisible of course. Imagine just being able to go from seen to unseen on a dime. Who wouldn't want to have the opportunity to be invisible? Superman and Batman have nothing on being invisible with their superhero abilities. Here are some things that you could do while being invisible, because being invisible can benefit your social life too.

Keep Reading...Show less

19 Lessons I'll Never Forget from Growing Up In a Small Town

There have been many lessons learned.

houses under green sky
Photo by Alev Takil on Unsplash

Small towns certainly have their pros and cons. Many people who grow up in small towns find themselves counting the days until they get to escape their roots and plant new ones in bigger, "better" places. And that's fine. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought those same thoughts before too. We all have, but they say it's important to remember where you came from. When I think about where I come from, I can't help having an overwhelming feeling of gratitude for my roots. Being from a small town has taught me so many important lessons that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.

Keep Reading...Show less
​a woman sitting at a table having a coffee

I can't say "thank you" enough to express how grateful I am for you coming into my life. You have made such a huge impact on my life. I would not be the person I am today without you and I know that you will keep inspiring me to become an even better version of myself.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

college students waiting in a long line in the hallway

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments