In today's society, there is so much need to compare ourselves. Because of social media, we scroll for minutes, hours, for days looking at others and their lifestyle wishing we had what they had. The grass is greener on the other side. A saying that has become a way for many of us to think. I want you to know, you don't need to try to be anyone except you. Many of us try so hard to be someone we are not just so we can impress other people.
It being February, it is around that time where people may be wondering "what can I do or change to make that person want to be with me?" or telling yourself "I need to look/act a certain way to be attractive and wanted." I can relate to these thoughts because I often catch myself thinking this way.
There was a girl I once knew who had a crush on a boy for a LONG TIME! She became good friends with him and throughout the years she watched as he went through different relationships and watching out for what made him attracted to these girls. Over time she started making small changes in her life that she knew would probably grab his attention.
It started out with small changes. She had found out he liked girls with glasses, but she had perfect vision, so, she would buy inexpensive glasses and made sure to wear them around him. She knew the kind of music he listened too so she started to pretty much listen to a bunch of his favorite artists so she could bring it up in conversation to prove she was his type. Then came a time where he began to notice her, and they soon became a couple.
Of course, like in every relationship, there is a honeymoon phase. So, it started out the way she had imagined, and it was great, but even then, who she was began to change. This started to show more and more over time. She began to feel not good enough just being herself in the relationship and completely transformed her lifestyle to fit into his so he wouldn't leave. All the changes she made to herself to fit into his ideal girlfriend lead to losing sight of herself.
Yes, this story can be seen as a very sad and unfortunate situation, but she sees this as a blessing in disguise. How do I know this? It is because this is my story. I used to be the girl who tried so hard to be wanted or liked that if someone told me to be myself, I wouldn't really know what that meant for me. I had to make a decision to stop trying to be who I'm not. I know that this can be very difficult to do, but I want everyone to feel encouraged to put in effort into yourself instead of the way the world believes who you should be.
All I have left to say is not only me talking to me who tried too hard, but to all of the girls who have tried or are currently trying too hard, I want you to tell yourself that you are loved and important. You don't need to try so hard that you give who you are away. You are loved and important. The people in your life who love you for are the ones you should appreciate having in your life because they are the ones who see you without you even trying.