What to do when you're not getting a response to your texts
Start writing a post

Gone are the glory days of carrier pigeon and waiting three months of waiting for your true love to confess his or her most intimate thoughts scrawled in black ink across a golden piece of parchment. Truly this constant test of time strengthened each other's love for one another. You millennials don't know what you're missing.


Did you get my text?http://rebloggy.com/post/harry-potter-starkidpotte...


Well you didn't text me back!http://rebloggy.com/post/harry-potter-starkidpotte...

If you haven't seen Starkid's "A Very Potter Sequel" I suggest you watch it. It's funny, it's lighthearted, and it brings to light a question we all ask our silent phone: "did you get my text?" Let's talk about this for a moment. Are you measuring your self-worth by how many texts you get in a day? Or the strengths of your relationships by how much someone texts you back? I understand, I really do. For those of us who actively express our love through words of affirmation or time spent in conversations, it can hurt when other people don't reciprocate. You'll text someone and him, she, or they just won't text back for who knows how long. I don't know about you, but thoughts will circulate in my head. "What did I do to upset them?" "Why don't they like me?" "Why am I putting more effort into this relationship than they are?"


media0.giphy.com


Take a deep breath friend, and reflect.

This reflection will look different for everyone: perhaps speaking your thoughts aloud, writing it down, meeting with a friend for coffee and externally processing that way, taking a shower, finding a secluded area and filtering your thoughts through your head. The point is to come to an understanding and peace.

I will often have a full conversation aloud with myself to sort through my emotions and thoughts.

"How do I feel?"

"Well, my friend didn't text me back so I feel bad."

"Bad, how?"

"Sad."

"Why?"

"I feel as though she doesn't love me."

This is where I can clearly grab onto that thought. I personally express my love through my conversations with others. I have a great desire to speak with people, I respond as soon as I can, I put thought into the words I use. But that's just me. My mom expresses her love through acts of service, I would never judge how much she loves me on how much she texts me. My dad is an engineer and would rather email me than text me (weird, right?). My roommate makes sure I've eaten. None of them express their love in the same way, and I have slowly learned to be okay when they don't text me back. It's still a learning challenge for me accepting others' silence, however, and that's where I continue to reflect, to try to understand, and to not only love but trust the person on the other side of my phone screen.


assets.rbl.ms


Love is not defined by attention

This is important to understand to protect your relationship, your friendship, yourself and others. I can love someone and not respond because I'm in the shower. Someone can love me and not check my text because they have an exam tomorrow.

People can date and go days without speaking with each other (remember the carrier pigeon in the beginning?) There are lots of people who pay attention to our president. Lots of people who do not love him. At all. Once you accept that love is not attention, a lack of attention no longer has the power to dampen your mood.

Love does not equal attention. Love is a separate, much more powerful entity that extends beyond attention. Attention can be a form of active love, but is by no means the only one, nor should it ever be. Love is a daily, often hourly choice we decide to partake in, and if that love is not expressed through text 24/7 365 days a year, that's okay.

This is not to say you get a free pass for never texting someone back, nor does it mean it's necessarily healthy in a relationship for a couple to never communicate with each other. This is a conversation for you to have with your friend or significant other. Discuss how texting affects your relationship, romantically or platonically. Ask how much texting plays a part in the other person's life. Understanding their point of view leads to a stronger relationship with more trust and acceptance of silence.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Olivia White

"The American flag does not fly because the wind moves it. It flies from the last breath of each solider who died protecting it."

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

Separation Anxiety in Pets

Separation anxiety in pets is a real thing and recognizing the warning signs is important.

191810

Since March, Covid-19 required most of the world to quarantine in their homes. Majority of people ended up working from home for nearly five months. This meant pet owners were constantly with their pets giving them attention, playing with them, letting them out etc. Therefore, when the world slowly started to open up again and pet owners began returning to normal life work schedules away from the home, pet owners noticed a difference in the way their pet acted. Many pets develop separation anxiety especially during this crazy time when majority people were stuck inside barely leaving the house.

Keep Reading... Show less
Robert Bye on Unsplash

I live by New York City and I am so excited for all of the summer adventures.

Keep Reading... Show less
Featured

The invention of photography

The history of photography is the recount of inventions, scientific discoveries and technical improvements that allowed human beings to capture an image on a photosensitive surface for the first time, using light and certain chemical elements that react with it.

356935

The history of photography is the recount of inventions, scientific discoveries and technical improvements that allowed human beings to capture an image on a photosensitive surface for the first time, using light and certain chemical elements that react with it.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

Exposing Kids To Nature Is The Best Way To Get Their Creative Juices Flowing

Constantly introducing young children to the magical works of nature will further increase the willingness to engage in playful activities as well as broaden their interactions with their peers

1759413

Whenever you are feeling low and anxious, just simply GO OUTSIDE and embrace nature! According to a new research study published in Frontiers in Psychology, being connected to nature and physically touching animals and flowers enable children to be happier and altruistic in nature. Not only does nature exert a bountiful force on adults, but it also serves as a therapeutic antidote to children, especially during their developmental years.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

5 Simple Ways To Give Yourself Grace, Especially When Life Gets Hard

Grace begins with a simple awareness of who we are and who we are becoming.

1114521
Photo by Brooke Cagle on Unsplash

If there's one thing I'm absolutely terrible at, it's giving myself grace. I'm easily my own worst critic in almost everything that I do. I'm a raging perfectionist, and I have unrealistic expectations for myself at times. I can remember simple errors I made years ago, and I still hold on to them. The biggest thing I'm trying to work on is giving myself grace. I've realized that when I don't give myself grace, I miss out on being human. Even more so, I've realized that in order to give grace to others, I need to learn how to give grace to myself, too. So often, we let perfection dominate our lives without even realizing it. I've decided to change that in my own life, and I hope you'll consider doing that, too. Grace begins with a simple awareness of who we are and who we're becoming. As you read through these five affirmations and ways to give yourself grace, I hope you'll take them in. Read them. Write them down. Think about them. Most of all, I hope you'll use them to encourage yourself and realize that you are never alone and you always have the power to change your story.

Keep Reading... Show less
Entertainment

Breaking Down The Beginning, Middle, And End of Netflix's Newest 'To All The Boys' Movie

Noah Centineo and Lana Condor are back with the third and final installment of the "To All The Boys I've Loved Before" series

992939
Netflix

Were all teenagers and twenty-somethings bingeing the latest "To All The Boys: Always and Forever" last night with all of their friends on their basement TV? Nope? Just me? Oh, how I doubt that.

I have been excited for this movie ever since I saw the NYC skyline in the trailer that was released earlier this year. I'm a sucker for any movie or TV show that takes place in the Big Apple.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

4 Ways To Own Your Story, Because Every Bit Of It Is Worth Celebrating

I hope that you don't let your current chapter stop you from pursuing the rest of your story.

652937
Photo by Manny Moreno on Unsplash

Every single one of us has a story.

I don't say that to be cliché. I don't say that to give you a false sense of encouragement. I say that to be honest. I say that to be real.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments