Telling someone your story right after your perpetrator stole your body and took your dignity away from you can be hard. You may want to jump in the shower, pretend like nothing happened and move on. Do not shower! Your body is the best living place of evidence to get your perpetrator convicted. You may not even be sure if you want to report to the police, but I encourage you to. If you don’t personally see the need of reporting, think about future potential victims of the same perpetrator. A perpetrator, or as we also can call him - a rapist, usually rapes more than only you. A guy with the mindset of a rapists doesn’t do only a “one-time-thing." If your perpetrator does not have a criminal record from the past, he can ‘finally’ get one now if you chose to stand up and stop him. He may have raped women before without being caught, and you letting him get away with your dignity will mean that his mindset becomes stronger because you let him get away with it, and he will attempt to rape more women, because it was so easy for him the first time.
In this situation you are your own gold pot. Your body is the best evidence of any action that happened. The earlier you report the better. The evidence is stronger and you can also do something called a pre-text. A pre-text is a set up phone conversation (usually from the police department) that is being recorded and listened to by police officers. You call from your own number, with an already written script in front of you, trying to get the perpetrator to admit to having raped you. A pre-text can be so important that it ends up being the strongest evidence in a potential case. It can be scary because you have to call the guy that stole your body, pretend like nothing happened and ask him about the rape. In the long run a pre-text can be essential for a win in a court case.
If you tell your parents they may react with sentences like “why didn’t you say anything?” and “why didn’t you try to stop him?” This doesn’t necessarily mean that your parents are doing victim blaming, but because of lack of knowledge they have nothing better to say. Yes, it is bad. You are probably already blaming yourself, and now your parents are too. Connect with your closest rape crisis organization for further help and support. Many of their workers have been raped themselves plus that they are educated in how to treat victims. They will not blame you, but listen to your story, and help you from there – depending on what you want or need.
Out of a 1000 rapists, 994 will walk free. Help future women by reporting your case. 1 in 6 women has been the victim of an attempted or completed rape in her lifetime (14.8% completed, 2.8% attempted).
