Coming home for Thanksgiving for college students brings two main challenges:
- Trying to eat as much home cooked food as possible
- Trying to avoid the infamous slaughter of painful questions from your family members.
In addition to family, friends, and health, one of the many blessings I was thankful for this year included Thanksgiving Clapbacks, the social media-inspired, shameless responses to these ruthless questions that allowed me to survive the holiday season. However, as a Mexican-American, there were a few that hit all too close to home.
1. Tia: “Oye, estas gorda!” Me: “Mira, tú tienes más arrugas.”
2. Tia: “Tattoos are a lifetime commitment.” Me: “But that brown hair on your head wasn’t, rubia.”
3. Tia: “How’s your love life looking?” Me: “Just like your tamales, dry and lacking some spice.”
4. Tio: “Why does your hair look like that?” Me: “Why does your menudo smell like that?”
5. Tio: “Maybe your grades would be better if you spent a little less time on social media.” Me: “Maybe your frijoles would taste better if you didn't drink all the cerveza.”
6. Prima: “When are you going to stop eating all the tamales?" Me: “When are you going to stop having kids?”
7. When your primo brings back la misma novia from last Thanksgiving and tu tias como
8. Mama: “When are you going to finish cleaning this house? You know your cousins are coming.” Me: “When you gonna flavor this masa?”
I hope you all had a fantastic Thanksgiving, full of tamales, menudo, turkey, stuffing, and as much shade and clapbacks as mine.
