I Am A Survivor Of Sexual Violence, And I Am OK
Rape victims are THE victims and stop telling them that they aren't.
I was in old sweatpants and the same hoodie that I have worn for the past 3 days. I didn't have a single drop of makeup on. I was a senior in high school with one month left so this specific appearance choice was very common.
Senior year of high school was a joke because the only thing I was interested in was graduating. You want me to pay attention? No thank you, I have texts to respond to. I had been talking to this guy from a different school for only a few days, but you know teenage girls... I was already planning our wedding. He had texted me in the middle of a school day asking if I wanted to hang out afterward.
Of course, I said yes. We met at Panera around 3:30 PM on a very dreary April afternoon. We only sat there for ten minutes before he asked me, "do you want to come meet my parents?" Again, my teenage self was jumping inside. So I said yes because I have to tell his parents about the upcoming wedding.
He drove me to his house. We walked inside and his parents were not home. He acted as if he already knew that they were not going to be home. Something in me became nervous. I have never been alone with a boy before in an empty house. Yeah, I know that I was 18, but my parents were very strict, which I should have not taken for granted.
"It doesn't look like my parents are home and I doubt that they will be for a few hours," he said to me. He continued with "do you want to watch a movie?" I agreed and we started to watch Zoolander. Not even five minutes into the movie, he started to make sexual gestures towards me. I kept saying, "please stop." He would apologize and try it again.
This happened for a good ten minutes. After one more attempt at trying to stop him, he just ended up pinning me down onto the couch. I started screaming and yelling. He told me that no one was home and that I am wasting my breath. I will save the details because I am sure you all know what happened next. When he was done, my voice was gone. He hopped off of me and drove me to my car. After he dropped me off, he said, "just to let you know, I grew up with a lot of money, so whatever you try to do against me, I will win. Please do not ever talk to me again. You are already blocked on my phone," and he drove off.
I think about that day a lot and it has now been almost 4 years. I didn't talk to the police, my parents, or anyone. I was so scared of losing, not only the case but myself. I was convinced that his last ever statement to me was true. I finally opened up about it a year ago. I told my parents, my brother, and my closest friends. It was like a mountain was lifted off of me because I didn't have to keep that secret anymore.
The point of this story is that we need to stop this "rape culture." I promise you that you are not alone. Turn their ass in. Take them down. Ruin their life like you think they ruined yours.
Don't be scared. Believe that you are so important and your well-being is what matters the most. We need to stop letting stupid people saying, "maybe if you didn't wear revealing clothing, that wouldn't have happened to you," because guess what?
IT STILL HAPPENS NO MATTER WHAT SOMEONE IS WEARING.
Read the first sentence of this article. Stop telling yourself that your opinion doesn't matter. Stop belittling yourself on something that was not even your fault. You are not vulnerable. You are not "stupid."
You are not ruined. I promise you that you can recover from anything you set your mind to. Of course, I still think about the situation, but I have started talking about it more, especially with people who have been through what I have. I know that I have been put through all of this to be a guide for others.
That is my sole purpose on this Earth. If you ever need someone to talk to, please do not hesitate to reach out to me.
My Dad Is A Cop And I Could Not Be Prouder, So Please Don't Make Terrible Cop Comments Around Me
Being a cop's daughter is probably the most stressful life a girl can have.
Being a cop's daughter is probably the most stressful life a girl can have.
I didn't choose this life but, I was born into it. There are nights to where that I never know if my dad will ever come home or if it is the last time I see him when he walks out the door for work. At night, when he's at work and the phone rings it is probably the scariest thing because I never know if it's the call that will make my life change forever.
I know that some people don't like cops or "hates" them but, they are human just like you and me. They also have families and people who love them. I am so proud that my dad is a cop because he puts his life in danger sometimes because he wants to protect other people's life.
So, when I scroll through social media and see that people are bashing cops I take that to heart because I have someone who I love deeply putting his life on the line every day and he should not be bashed because of something that another cop did. Not all cops are bad. Please keep your comments to yourself because I see them and they actually hurt me to read.
When you find out that my dad is a cop, please don't make the comments "If I get pulled over, I will just say that I'm his daughter's friend so I don't get a ticket" or "Will your dad get me out of a ticket?" No, my dad will not get you out of a ticket. If you are in the position to get a ticket then take the ticket. I'm not going to be your friend if the reason is that you think that my dad will get you out of trouble. Also, don't get mad when I actually text or call my dad to see if he will help you out and he says no.
Just know that cops are human too and they have families at home. Think before you post something bad or something terrible about a cop. Just know that everyone will see that and it will get back around to the families of the officer.
Also, all the families have the back all the officers no matter where they are from. Please be respectful and next time you see a cop on the street don't make a bad comment, tell him to thank you for all he does. That one simple comment will make his or her day.