The doubt of reality starts to really sinking in when you're in college.
The majority of us thinks that college is going to be the best time of our lives and we know what we are going to do. This is the time where we start to find and know ourselves. This is the time where we start to assume that adult role and responsibility. However, there are college students that start having an identity crisis. We start questioning who we are and we tend to get stuck in this because we are faced with a challenge to our sense of self.
I'm currently a freshman in college and all year, I've been having an identity crisis which I hate to admit it. I'm supposed to thrive but all I do is sit alone at my dorm room, late at night and crying for hours. I have a mental breakdown a couple of times throughout the year just because I feel like I don't know who I am. All these extracurricular that I have done this year has messed up my head because I feel like I'm not good at anything.
I feel like I don't fit anywhere because I think that I'm a terrible person that doesn't deserve to fit in. I have changed my intended major ten million times and I still don't know what I want to do. I think about transferring to a university near home so I don't feel the need to constantly go home. I call my sister every time when I know that I'm going to breakdown. I just start spilling about how I'm feeling and eventually, I get over myself.
However, I have learned from my wise sister that everyone doesn't know what they want and who they are. If they do, they are most likely a psycho. There are going to be times of uncertainty and that's just how life works. We have to shape who we want to be by living our life and learning through experiences. Not even one semester is going to tell us who we are, but it is a piece that contributes to our identity. Every experience shapes who we are going to be. It sticks with us and how it impacts the choices that we make in the future. Interaction of people and places that you go have the biggest impact on how we identify ourselves.
Though, no matter where we end up, we will always have an identity crisis because of new experiences. College is a new experience so it's where we struggle the most with our identity. So it's extremely important to develop strong relationships to help propel us with finding our identity. Sometimes, the identity we create is not the one that we want or expect. Maybe it's because of who we need to be, not who we want to be. However, no matter what, we will continue on the roads with different directions that pave the way for our ever-changing identities.