Stop Letting Little Things Get In The Way Of Your Relationship With Your Parents

Stop Letting Little Things Get In The Way Of Your Relationship With Your Parents

No matter how much resentment we're feeling in a moment of anger, we have to be grateful the support they provide and the roof over our head and learn to forgive over everything else.

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I'd say I fight with my parents as much as the next teenage girl, if not more. Our arguments stem from little things like pent up aggression over things from our day to day life, to bigger things like resentment of the distant relationships I have with some of my other relatives. Throughout high school, it often seemed like everything was a fight, and if it wasn't between me and one of my parents, it was the two of them fighting and me feeling stuck in the middle.

There would be times when I'd be sitting in my room frantically scribbling in a diary about how it's so unfair that I am so close and yet so distant with my parents at the same time. I didn't want to let it bother me that our relationship existed in the way it did, but I felt so close to my parents and cared so much at the same time that it was tearing me apart.

On top of that, I was always jealous of some of my friends who didn't seem to be dealing with these issues at home like I was, but I've come to see over the years that even those who seem like they have ideal family dynamics probably have some underlying stuff going on under the surface, and no one's situation is perfect.

Part of the reason I work all week during break, aside from the money, of course, is to be out of the house. I know if I was home any more than I already am, it would be too easy for my parents and me to go back to the constant fighting. At work, I eat lunch with my friend Krysta every day, but the best days are when our favorite coworker is on her lunch break at the same time as us. Her chisme and hilarious way of storytelling always have us laughing hysterically, and although she is almost old enough to be our mom, she feels more like a best friend.

A few days ago, however, our lunch conversation had a change of pace, and the story she recounted had us shedding actual tears instead of our usual tears of laughter. A more serious topic had come up, and she sat us down to explain the importance of forgiveness, especially with our parents. Telling stories of her resentful relationship with her mother and growing up homeless at times, she changed my whole outlook on life and my feelings towards my parents. She reminded us that no matter how much resentment we're feeling in a moment of anger, we have to be grateful the support they provide and the roof over our head and learn to forgive over everything else.

Being away at college, the distance has definitely improved and restored my close relationship with my parents. Even this month I've spent at home for break still feels like the honeymoon stage, with very little conflict and a lot of spending quality time together. Our family is still very distant with many of our relatives, but if anything came out of my complicated, to say the least, relationship with my extended family, it would be that I've already learned this lesson to some extent from a young age. Seeing my parent's distant relationships with their own parents and siblings has definitely made me aware of how important it is to move past grudges and work to repair broken relationships, but sometimes you need a reminder. My coworker's moving stories not only brought me to tears in the break room at work that day but definitely served as that wake-up call as well.

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I'm A Woman And You Can't Convince Me Breastfeeding In Public Is OK In 2019

Sorry, not sorry.

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Lately, I have seen so many people going off on social media about how people shouldn't be upset with mothers breastfeeding in public. You know what? I disagree.

There's a huge difference between being modest while breastfeeding and just being straight up careless, trashy and disrespectful to those around you. Why don't you try popping out a boob without a baby attached to it and see how long it takes for you to get arrested for public indecency? Strange how that works, right?

So many people talking about it bring up the point of how we shouldn't "sexualize" breastfeeding and seeing a woman's breasts while doing so. Actually, all of these people are missing the point. It's not sexual, it's just purely immodest and disrespectful.

If you see a girl in a shirt cut too low, you call her a slut. If you see a celebrity post a nude photo, you call them immodest and a terrible role model. What makes you think that pulling out a breast in the middle of public is different, regardless of what you're doing with it?

If I'm eating in a restaurant, I would be disgusted if the person at the table next to me had their bare feet out while they were eating. It's just not appropriate. Neither is pulling out your breast for the entire general public to see.

Nobody asked you to put a blanket over your kid's head to feed them. Nobody asked you to go feed them in a dirty bathroom. But you don't need to basically be topless to feed your kid. Growing up, I watched my mom feed my younger siblings in public. She never shied away from it, but the way she did it was always tasteful and never drew attention. She would cover herself up while doing it. She would make sure that nothing inappropriate could be seen. She was lowkey about it.

Mindblowing, right? Wait, you can actually breastfeed in public and not have to show everyone what you're doing? What a revolutionary idea!

There is nothing wrong with feeding your baby. It's something you need to do, it's a part of life. But there is definitely something wrong with thinking it's fine to expose yourself to the entire world while doing it. Nobody wants to see it. Nobody cares if you're feeding your kid. Nobody cares if you're trying to make some sort of weird "feminist" statement by showing them your boobs.

Cover up. Be modest. Be mindful. Be respectful. Don't want to see my boobs? Good, I don't want to see yours either. Hard to believe, I know.

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A Goodbye Letter To My Best Friend

You'll always be my puppy.

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Dear Lexie,

I grew up with you, and then I watched you grow old. For 14 years you loved our family and greeted us each morning with your puppy smile. I'll never forget those first few years of life with you.

As you and your playful soul grew, so did my love for you. I have memory upon memory of you romping around on the carpet in our living room, eagerly seeking to engage us in a playful endeavor. Your tail would wag and your tongue would flop as you ran around in circles sharing your unbridled joy with us all. I'd then find one of your many toys and send it careening through air for you to dash across the living room in a tizzy.

As you continued to grow, so did your excitement and optimism for new feats of playfulness. Even in the sweltering heat of July, you would tear across the backyard in search of lost toys and a space to play. You'd run circles non-stop and I could never keep up with you! But as soon as both of us were tired, a nice swim would cool us both down. I would sit on the pool stairs next to you, both of us drenched after a dip, and just listen to you pant away while you still held your puppy smile. You were satisfied with yet another day filled with laughter, play, and companionship.

Even in your youth, you still had your moments of love and calm. I can remember the days when we would all sit as a family watching TV and you would sit quietly at our feet. Then when the time came, you would come and rest your head on the empty seat next to me and give me those big old puppy dog eyes. You always wanted to sit on the couch, and I always eventually caved. A quick two slaps on the seat and you would enthusiastically jump on to comfortably join me.

And the one thing I'll never forget about you Lexie was your insatiable hunger! Scores of cakes and cookies left on the kitchen counter were lost to you over the years. And even after a day of looting, you'd come to us at the kitchen table to rest your head on my leg to beg for more food (and once more I couldn't resist).

As you got on in age, you began to grow a white beard which stood out on your chocolate fur. You were no longer running around as frequently as you once had, but you still had every desire to play. But the one thing that never disappeared was that beautiful puppy smile. And so as I write this goodbye to you on February 2nd of 2019, I want you to know that we all love and miss you. You were a beacon of hope for our family, and you never let your ailments dampen your wonderful spirit. I'll never forget you or the times we had. I know now that you can finally steal all the cookies and cakes you want! While today might have been sad, I will forever remember all the joy you brought to us. Here's to you Lexie, my best friend of 14 years. I hope one day I can see your puppy smile once more.


Love,

Anthony

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