When to move on from them
Start writing a post

When You Can't Learn to Let Go

But you need to tell yourself you can.

30
When You Can't Learn to Let Go
Samantha Santorelli

Months after it happened, I was still scared. It felt as though every day got harder and harder, never any easier. It felt as though I had been abandoned and my happiness had been drained out of my body. The previous stitches put in place, ripped out one by one. Sorry to be so dramatic, but absolutely no one in the world could relate to the feeling of my heart being so shattered I had no idea if it could even be repaired. I waited weeks for a response for an "I miss you text" or an "I'm sorry. Come see me" but it never arrived. I asked myself what could I have done to wrong you for you to treat me like this? I cried myself to sleep most nights waiting for your arrival that never came.

It was then after we spoke months after the incident when I had a revelation. I allowed you to come back and leave as you please, never thinking much of it. It was when I stopped and took a step back and looked at myself and thought, I cannot keep allowing this to happen. How many times can you let the same thing break your heart? I don't know if it speaks less of you for being careless with my heart or less of me for allowing it to happen. After we spoke, I finally got it; not the closure I so desperately needed from you, but the closure I gave myself when I walked away from you. You had moved on, with another girl doing the same things you did with me. You have given your love and flowers to a new girl who will soon be in my shoes. I woke up one day after speaking with you and realized you are no longer the person I want nor need, you have become someone who destroys me every time I have come back to you, a little more each time.

It all begins and ends with the mind. I allowed you to take advantage of my kindness and my fragile heart, using me as a stepping stone to get to the next step in your life. For a while, I could not fathom how you could fall so quickly out of love and into another girl's arms. I realized that I need to give myself the love I so desperately wanted from you. I wished you would have picked up the phone and called me to tell me you loved me and that you made a mistake. When that call never came, I was forced to move on. Move past this toxic cycle you wanted to call a relationship. I had moved past checking in on you and looking into your social media, searching for a sign that you missed me. It was then when I decided I wanted to move on from you, and start loving myself the way I deserve to be loved. I am going to receive the entire world and more, even if I have to give it to myself.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
the beatles
Wikipedia Commons

For as long as I can remember, I have been listening to The Beatles. Every year, my mom would appropriately blast “Birthday” on anyone’s birthday. I knew all of the words to “Back In The U.S.S.R” by the time I was 5 (Even though I had no idea what or where the U.S.S.R was). I grew up with John, Paul, George, and Ringo instead Justin, JC, Joey, Chris and Lance (I had to google N*SYNC to remember their names). The highlight of my short life was Paul McCartney in concert twice. I’m not someone to “fangirl” but those days I fangirled hard. The music of The Beatles has gotten me through everything. Their songs have brought me more joy, peace, and comfort. I can listen to them in any situation and find what I need. Here are the best lyrics from The Beatles for every and any occasion.

Keep Reading...Show less
Being Invisible The Best Super Power

The best superpower ever? Being invisible of course. Imagine just being able to go from seen to unseen on a dime. Who wouldn't want to have the opportunity to be invisible? Superman and Batman have nothing on being invisible with their superhero abilities. Here are some things that you could do while being invisible, because being invisible can benefit your social life too.

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

19 Lessons I'll Never Forget from Growing Up In a Small Town

There have been many lessons learned.

49457
houses under green sky
Photo by Alev Takil on Unsplash

Small towns certainly have their pros and cons. Many people who grow up in small towns find themselves counting the days until they get to escape their roots and plant new ones in bigger, "better" places. And that's fine. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought those same thoughts before too. We all have, but they say it's important to remember where you came from. When I think about where I come from, I can't help having an overwhelming feeling of gratitude for my roots. Being from a small town has taught me so many important lessons that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.

Keep Reading...Show less
​a woman sitting at a table having a coffee
nappy.co

I can't say "thank you" enough to express how grateful I am for you coming into my life. You have made such a huge impact on my life. I would not be the person I am today without you and I know that you will keep inspiring me to become an even better version of myself.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

121735
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments