The Cullen Girls: Part 14
Follow the lives of Meredith, Amy, Olivia, Sarah, and Jane Cullen, as they navigate the unknown territories that come with building a family through adoption.
Meredith can think of every friend her girls have ever had. Amy had a lot of close friends, mostly from college. In high school, her friends often changed. Amy had her priorities, but being in so many different clubs meant she knew a lot of people. Olivia was her social butterfly. She knew everything about everyone, and people took to her quickly. Her carefree, wild spirit was infectious, and she'd been like that since she was a kid. She came home with a new best friend every week, yet somehow managed to keep all the other ones, too. Birthday parties were impossible for Olivia – she wanted to invite everyone, always afraid she was leaving someone out. Sarah had a lot of friends without even trying. She was popular all through elementary, middle, and high school. She was so casual about it, almost like she didn't care.
Jane still had her best friend from kindergarten, Pete. They'd been inseparable to the point that it became a problem. They wouldn't let anyone else play with them, and they sat alone at snack time. When each child was confronted about it, neither could see the issue. This kept up until third grade when a counselor finally got it out of Jane. Pete lived with an uncle after his parents were killed in a car accident. Jane felt no need for anyone else in her new life – she had Meredith and her sisters, and Pete. Put simply, each other was all they needed, and neither Meredith or Pete's uncle saw a problem with this. Both Pete and Jane were doing well in school and at home, but the school saw it as a social setback. They interacted with their classmates, but their preference was each other. Eventually, they stopped being so co-dependent with the help of Mr. Thomas for Jane, and the school counselor for Pete, but until recently, they still spent most of their time with each other.
Meredith knows enough about Davey, and mostly from Olivia. Jane was so secretive when it came to boys. It's the one time Meredith encourages Olivia to dig into someone else's business. But when she starts seeing less of Pete and more of Davey at the house, Meredith goes straight to Jane.
"Hey, baby. What are you doing?" Meredith finds her reading at the kitchen table.
"Just homework." Jane puts the book down.
"Can I ask you something?" Meredith pulls cookies out of the cabinet and Jane takes her cue to grab the milk.
"I guess."
"I know you really like Davey, and he's a nice boy, I like him, too…"
"But…" Jane prompts.
"Pete hasn't been around lately. And he's been your best friend almost your whole life."
"It's not like that, mom." Jane cuts her short, huffing and crossing her arms.
"What's the matter?"
"It's Pete! He won't come over if Davey's here, and he won't hang out with me if Davey's there, too. He's being impossible."
"Have you been spending time with just him?"
"Yes! I've tried! But it's not like I have a lot of free time. It's hard, I try to spend the same amount with both of them, but sometimes I want to be with Davey…and then when I am with Pete, all he does is complain and make digs at Davey!" Jane puts her head on the table, groaning. Meredith can't help but laugh.
"He's probably a little jealous."
"A little?"
"Ok, think about it. He's been the only guy in your life, and now suddenly there's another guy you're crazy about. And spending a lot of time with him, too."
"Look, I've tried. I can't help that he's being a baby about all of this."
"Jane."
Jane looks up. "He hasn't talked to me in two days." Her eyes fill as she throws herself in her mom's lap.
"Oh, baby. Just give him some time, he'll come around. Keep being his friend; it proves to him that he still matters to you."
"I can't stand it," Jane moans, her face still buried. Meredith just lets her cry it out, patiently waiting.
"Do you really think he'll come around? He just seems so…hurt, but I can't see why."
"Because he knows there nothing to be jealous about, but he can't help what he's feeling."
Jane nods, thinking about her mom's words, still spread across her lap when Sarah comes downstairs.
"Hey, mom. Hey, loser. What's the matter?"
"I saw your face," Jane mutters, not looking up.
"Are you sure it wasn't your own reflection?"
"I wouldn't know, I couldn't see anything after I saw you."
"Ok, enough." Meredith jumps in, throwing a look at Sarah, while also noting she looks tired, but not stressed.
"What, I was just playing. She always takes it so serious." Meredith ignores Sarah's eye roll but still pulls her in for a hug. Then she takes in Jane's face as she moves to stand up, searching it with more concern than ever before. Despite the calm that seems to have settled over their family after everything that happened, Meredith is convinced she's traumatized her youngest daughter and watches the other three like a vulture for any signs of distress. She knows they notice and knows they humor her with their patient reassurances that they're still fine, and alive, and happy since she last asked, called, or dropped by.
Jane mumbles about taking her homework up to her room, and Sarah can see this upsets Meredith. Knowing something's upsetting Jane as well, Sarah steals a cookie and tells them, "Ollie, and I are running to the store. She said she's staying for dinner." With a quick kiss to Meredith's cheek, which she returns with an appreciative and knowing smile, Sarah leaves first before Jane can, who sits at the table with a face that's hard to read. She was different, sensitive in a way that no one could quite grasp, but only Meredith worried it was permanent. Her sisters were sure it was just going to take some time to recover from the incident, and it was nothing serious.
……………..
"How serious do you think it's going to get?" Olivia stops walking, turning to Sarah. She walks right into Olivia, who just stands there, waiting.
"God, Ollie. I don't know." Sarah pushes her out of the way, looking for the stupid spices on Amy's list. Meredith was going out of town for a business trip, so they were all staying at Amy's for the weekend. This was an opportunity for her to cook, but she always needed the weirded spices.
"If you think about it - "
"I don't."
" - this is mom's longest relationship."
Sarah ignores her nosey, annoying sister and picks out two bottles of a spice she can't pronounce. When 20 peaceful seconds pass without Olivia opening her mouth, Sarah turns to her. She's leaning against the cart, chin in hand, lost in thought.
"Ollie, it's not that big a deal. If it's so serious, mom will tell - "
"No, no she won't. She always keeps her boyfriends away. I think she's afraid to have a relationship because of us."
"Ok, you've been reading too many of Amy's psychology books."
"Fine, maybe not afraid, but she does always put us first."
"You're being dramatic."
"I'm not."
Their arguing comes to an abrupt stop. They've reached the snack aisle, a dangerous aisle. Grabbing the cart, covering each other's hands, they start moving forward. Sarah is the first to reach for the shelves.
"Hey!" Olivia smacks her hand.
"We really do need chips and salsa, but also two packages of Oreos."
Olivia looks at her. "We do not."
"Yeah, it's on the list." Sarah can't keep a straight face.
"The chips, maybe." Olivia smacks her again. They manage to make it down the aisle with the chips and salsa and settle on one bag of Oreos. They're still trying to grab each other's hands and take control over pushing the cart when they collide into something.
"Oof," Olivia says, making Sarah laugh so that she snorts. When she looks to see what they've hit, it's Ryan standing behind a shopping cart. All the blood rushes to Sarah's face. They say each other's names at the same time, and then just stand there for a moment.
"Ryan."
"Sarah?"
"Olivia," Olivia adds, pointing to herself. Sarah is still holding her hand, and she takes this opportunity to dig her nails into it. Olivia yanks her hand away.
"I'm gonna keep on shopping, sis. You can catch up." She snatches the list from Sarah, who is still staring at Ryan, staring back at her. "Did you need to add anything to the list? Lotion, gum, condoms -"
"Go!" Sarah hisses, finally breaking eye contact. Ryan is trying not to laugh.
"Sorry about that. We're still trying to figure out what's wrong with her."
Ryan laughs again, and Sarah can't deny this does something to her insides, the way she can make him look like that. But just like they always were at clubs and bars, they shyly and awkwardly stand there and tease each other. They've never seen each other outside of the party scene. Something about being in public puts how they see each other in a new light.
"How've you been?" Ryan asks, and Sarah can't understand why she feels like crying, or why she doesn't want to lie to him.
"Honestly…not that great," she admits. She wants to say more, and he can tell that she does, but she stops. Ryan gently touches her arm.
"Do you want to grab coffee…or something?" He laughs sheepishly.
"Yeah, just give me a sec." She can feel him watching as she walks away, and she's still stupidly smiling when she finds Olivia putting ice cream in the cart.
"Can you finish shopping?"
"What's his name?"
Sarah rolls her eyes. "Olivia, you know who that is. He goes to all the same places we do."
"Does he? I don't recognize him."
"Yeah, you wouldn't. Look, I'll meet up with you later."
"When's later?"
"Put the ice cream back, Ollie!" Sarah calls over her shoulder, already walking away and ignoring Olivia's response.
"Don't you want your condoms?"
Sarah stops thinking about all the ways to kill Olivia when she sees Ryan.
"So, that's your sister?" he asks with a smile as they walk down the sidewalk. "Is she older or younger?"
"She acts younger, but she's older than me. I also have another older sister, and a younger one."
Ryan laughs.
"What?"
"I have two older brothers and a younger one."
"You're lying." Sarah teases. "You're just trying to have something in common with me."
"I swear!" he says. Sarah loves his eyes when he laughs. She looks away from them when he pulls out a picture of 4 identical boys. They all have the same handsome eyes and I-didn't-do-it smirk.
"God, you all look just the same."
"We get that a lot. I'm guessing you, and your sisters do, too."
Sarah smiles at his comment. Over the years the comments had ranged from looking just the same to "you must've all been adopted." Sarah waits until they're sitting inside the coffee shop to pull out the picture she kept. It was taken a few years ago at one of Meredith's work picnics. Olivia and Jane have their arms wrapped around each other, laughing at something. The odds are good it was only hilarious to the two of them. Beside them, Sarah is watching Amy, who is staring straight into the camera, the happiest smile on her face. It was Sarah's favorite picture of her sister. Ryan takes it now, studying it. He smiles when he sees it.
"You're all close, huh?"
Sarah nods. "Very. Maybe too much for our own good."
"My brothers and I are close now, but growing up, we hated each other." He points to the photo. "Who's that?"
"That would be Jane. She's our baby."
Ryan looks up at her. "Protective much?"
"Damn right."
Laughing, he points to Olivia. "That's your partner in crime? I've seen her around."
"Olivia, yes. And I'm sure you have."
"So who is this, smiling almost as pretty as you?"
"Amy, my oldest sister. She just got engaged."
"Ha! My brother's already been there, done that."
"Fine, your point. But I'm still winning."
"How do you figure that?"
"Cuz I said so." Sarah grins at him.
"Alright." Ryan agrees. "But only because I like you."
"Is that so?"
"It's true. In fact, I like you so much; I'm going to let you pay for my coffee." His grin at her laughing gives Sarah a weightless feeling she can't understand. "See, that's what I like. Making you laugh. You're not as upset anymore."
Now she gets what she's feeling. "It never takes long when I'm around you."
Their drinks arrive, and as Ryan hands her a mug, he asks, "Is it still bothering you, though?"
His concern shifts their fun teasing, but Sarah doesn't care. She wants to tell him everything.
"If we're going to do this - " Ryan raises his eyebrows and Sarah clarifies, "get to know each other, then the first thing you need to know is that my sisters and I are all adopted."
Ryan nods, unaffected, until Sarah rushes out, "And the second thing is that I really like you, and I don't want to say too much."
They watch each other from their sides of the table. Ryan reaches across, laying both hands out, palms up. Sarah slowly gives him her own.
"I will listen to anything you have to say."
