A Note on Kindred Spirits
A thought on a concept of friendship near and dear to my heart.
Have you ever read the book Anne of Green Gables?
Oh my good goodness, please go read the book Anne of Green Gables.
Synopsis time: this is a novel detailing the adventures of Anne Shirley, an incredibly wonderful young girl taken in and adopted by the strict yet endlessly loving Cuthberts, Marilla and Matthew. As her untethered imagination soars through the open air in which she finds herself, Anne quickly gets into every possible kind of trouble you can think of as well as proves herself to be one of the most ridiculously loveable characters ever written into existence, at least by my standards (which I'd like to think are respectable! At least in this case!).
I fell in love with Anne in every way imaginable. From her wild vocabulary of nonsensically sensible phrases to her affinity for naming every nook and cranny of her life with the most luxuriously beautiful imagery to her concern over the color of her hair and eyes to her bold childlike eccentricity to her everything, she was a clear example on page of all the intense absurdities flying around inside of my own head. I daydreamt myself into her stories with every single chance I got.
Fear not! There very much is a reason for all of the dense exposition you just read up there (read or skimmed or something, I dunno)! There are many wild wisdoms that Anne bestowed upon me as a child, but none resonated so strongly with me as an idea this girl had regarding friendship. Upon meeting who is to become her best friend, Diana Barry, Anne expresses that Diana will and does become something to her called a kindred spirit.
I know this is just a phrase coined from a fictional novel, but my goodness has that ever stuck with me. I couldn't tell you exactly why, but something about the phrase seems to capture more than just the blanket term of "friendship." A kindred spirit is something more.
From the context of the stories and the ideologies I've pulled from my own relationships, a kindred spirit is not a vague acquaintance you rope into a circle of friends. It is not the people you don't know and probably won't, the people who you don't really connect with (not necessarily in a bad way, you just don't click, that is ok), the people around whom you don't feel like you. A kindred spirit is someone you know you know. They are someone with whom you connect in ways you never would have expected. You can share with them the parts of you that even you are unsure about because you know they will understand. They just kind of get who you are and support you in being you. They are indescribably priceless.
A kindred spirit is someone to whom you actually give a piece of your heart because you know they'll keep it safe. And you're actually right about that.
I met a kindred spirit last year. Actually, before I even met her, people were telling me I had "big June Kwon energy." I did not know what that meant and did not know her in the slightest yet, and I could not have expressed how excited I was to find out about her.
When we met, talking with her just made sense. I would express some random thought in my head, and she'd echo some similar sentiment that made me realize I wasn't alone. She and I have similar tastes in everything, similar thought processes, similar so many things, but I don't even know if that makes a huge difference. Even if we were entirely differently shaped in our likes and dislikes, there is something magnetic about her personality that makes me feel so lucky to know her in every possible way. She is the Diana to my Anne, and knowing her has brightened my life so much.
All of this, dear reader, is just to say this. Find and surround yourself with the people you want to be with. The people who will build you up because they can, because they want to, because they understand. The people who are kind of just on the same wavelengths. The people who can find and match your emotional quotient to offer you empathy and care. Find your people. Find your friendship soulmates.
Find your kindred spirits.
