All I Want For Halloween Is To Be Scared Of Sugar
The tale of how candy tastes scary to me.
Most of the time, candy is not the kind of reward kids think of when presented a conditional situation. Throughout the year, they are promised and granted toys, experiences, and allowances for their good behavior, good grades, and overall goody two-shoes persona. Halloween comes along once a year and negates all the virtue and instead rewards you with the vices of all flavors, shapes, and sizes. You dress up as the nightmares of your imagination, maybe as the ones that frighten you the most, like the Batman does, and face your fears by mocking it in costume. But I do not object to a sexy Headless Horseman or Bearded Lady (can you imagine the necking? Horrific!). Halloween has a lasting effect, more than for its annual ceremony, that stays behind long after the night is out.
The cool air in the unwilling bend of the trees sends the heat in your body to your ears. Leaves share gossip about your every footstep alongside the even louder silence, your only company. Your stomach talks back to you, echoing like a cavern. It says to borrow sugar from more than one neighbor. Neighbors leave no sign of life, not one sordid tenement in sight, except the kitsch decorations of mechanical zombies, scaffolding skeletons, toilet paper ghosts, glitter-covered, plastic pumpkins, and the occasional GO AWAY! or NO MORE CANDY signs that is or is not ironic at this hour. The freaks should have been prowling earlier by now. Less tricks and more treats for you.
With your pillow case in tow and resourceful costume on your back, the last minute holiday houses are ready to be greeted. The first is no different from the last; just a regular cookie-cutter piece of suburbia. Though this house has no decorations. Up the path to the front door is no front door. In its place is a cobweb of drapes and bed sheets that seem used. Another unoriginal, but still classic, sign that reads TAKE ONE is suspended above a wooden stool where a bowl of candy resides. I thought it was trick or treat, not trick and treat. Regardless, I knew better than to outwit this haunted house or escape the game of afterlife it led werewolves, vampires, and robots to their doom with. As these sweet tooth monsters approached the bowl and reached in for their edible prize, a voice pounded their heads as if a snare drum and tuba fought over volume and background noise. The sound equaled out and found its desired receivers. They did not like the message.
My older-kid-neighbor that outgrew candy, and found extracurricular joy out of scaring children half his age with his high school band's mic and speakers, found the one holiday he could enjoy without remorse and vicarious sentimentality. I had to pat myself on my undead shoulder for knowing a trap when I saw one, although the gimmick's scare never wore off the rest of the evening. Every doorstep I managed to reach had me looking for a hidden Wizard of Oz derelict from ever being used for evil again.
And that was the last year I took part in Halloween.
My 10 Favorite YouTubers
They can all teach you something
I've fallen down into the rabbit hole that is YouTube. Lately, I've been finding the videos on YouTube much more entertaining than anything on Netflix or Hulu. There are so many videos out there about literally everything. Some of my favorite videos are murder mysteries or unsolved crime videos. But I also love watching movie commentaries or anything funny. If you like YouTube as much as I do, I highly recommend checking out these YouTubers.
1. Hailey Reese
Hailey is such a light in this world. Even though she talks about paranormal things which can oftentimes be scary, she always brings light and love to the video. Her videos are so informational and spooky. They're so fun to watch and interesting to think about. She is one of the soul siblings, and you will understand what I mean by that if you watch her channel. Also, you get to be a Reese's Peaces, what a cool name!
2. Kendall Rae
Kendall does a lot of different kinds of videos, but some of my favorite ones that she does are the True Crime videos. Many of the stories are sad or disturbing, but she does a fantastic job of being respectful of the families who lost a loved one as well as the person who is deceased. These stories really bring into perspective how messed up people in this world can be, but at the same time the beauty of our humanity and that there are good people in the world.
3. Dylan Is In Trouble
Ah, Dyan. Where to begin. He does a lot of movie commentaries. He has done commentaries on everything from kids movies, rom-coms, horror, and thriller. He apparently went to film school and so he actually analyzes the movies in a critical way. He always points out plot holes and cliches and makes it so entertaining to watch. He also shows the movie as he's watching it, so it's like you get to watch it without actually spending the hour and a half watching it. He's so entertaining to watch and makes me laugh every time, even if it's a serious movie. One of my favorite things is that he calls his followers "troublemakers" and as someone who rarely ever gets into trouble, I like it.
4. Jon Solo
If you're someone who loves Disney movies and fairytales, this channel is for you. Jon goes into the origin stories of various Disney movies, heroes, villains, and other fairytale creatures. It's amazing the amount of research he does in order to find and explain the origins of some of our favorite characters.
5. tiffanyferg
I'm a bit new to her channel, but she covers a range of topics that I think are very important. She talks about beauty standards, the college scandal, minimalism, mental health, and college struggles. As someone who is finishing college and still learning about myself, I really appreciate her analysis of these topics and the advice that she gives.
6. Brandi TV
Brandi is too funny. While I don't condone doing drugs, she does really funny "makeup" tutorials. I feel like I always cry from laughing so hard. One of my favorites is when she does a makeup tutorial for Ursula from the Little Mermaid. So funny. She is such a sweetheart and a pure soul.
7. Loey Lane
Loey is another light in this world. She talks about paranormal things, reads scary viral stories, body positivity, and her own personal experiences. Her makeup is always on point and brings so much light to sometimes dark topics. She is one of the soul siblings too!
8. The Try Guys
Do I even have to give an explanation for these guys? They try everything, and it's hilarious to watch them. My favorite series of theirs is when Keith eats everything on the menu from different fast food places. And they don't waste the food so that's a plus!
9. Alex Myers
Alex is another great YouTuber who does movie and Tv show commentaries, but he animates himself and his dog into the videos. It's very interesting to see, especially because sometimes he will talk about his own personal experiences and its very relatable. Also, his dog is super cute!
10. AndrewTMI
Last but not least, we have Andrew. I love how totally open and honest he is. He is very relatable and honestly hilarious. He is dramatic and that just makes his channel so entertaining. He is the last member of the soul siblings. When Hailey, Loey, and Andrew are together some real spooky stuff happens and it's some of the most entertaining videos to watch.
If you haven't heard of any of these YouTubers, please check them out. They are so great at entertaining and presenting facts. Even though I haven't met any of them, they all seem like really great, genuine people.