1. Extending USB cord
There must be USB plug that can stretch. The way a dogs leash will release more cord as it is pulled on, there needs to be a cord that can stretch as I roll over in bed without pulling the plug out of the wall. The struggle of being attached to a wall is too great.
2. Closet Organizer App
Some mornings you wake up and wonder how it was ever possible that you once found a decent looking outfit in your closet. Other days the prospect of having to dress yourself is just too much. There needs to be an app that can record what is in a closet and make an outfit, for any event, at the ready, similar to what Cher Horowitz has in Clueless.
3. Hangover Curing Drink
Stronger than Gatorade, better for you than pumping your stomach with Advil and water, and putting an end to the old "flu" excuse at work. A foolproof drink that can give everyone what they need to get up, pick their dignity off the floor, and soldier on. You all may thank me later.
4. Rent-A-Boyfriend
Have you ever had one of those weeks where you just need someone to bring you chocolate cake in bed and tell you you're beautiful? Maybe you really can't figure out how to build all the new Ikea furniture for your apartment and you are incapable of rounding up a guy friend to do it. Either way, the ability to rent a boyfriend on a needed basis would be quite handy. Think of all the stuff they could do for you, then you get to return them when you're done! It's like a dream.
5. Parking Tracker
What is it about parking garages that suddenly make everyone's memory go blank? Whatever the reason for the world's inability to keep track of their cars once stationary, it needs to be resolved. Too many minutes are lost aimlessly wandering the garage carrying heavy shopping bags. Please, someone invent a tracking app for your car, so that you can remember exactly where you parked and follow the map directly to it.
6. Forever-Hot Coffee Mug
I'm not sure what type of wizardry would be required to create a coffee mug that can abolish the awful lukewarm state that coffee turns into after such a short period of time, but someone needs to discover it. Long nights of studying and hours-long brunches of switching between the mimosa and the sweet nectar of the Gods will be forever changed by never again fearing cool coffee.
7. Teleportation Pad
GiphyThe year is 2015; I was promised a flying car. In lieu of the flying car -- I am willing to accept teleportation pads. Think about travel becoming as easy as "stand here and click that button." Imagine not having to bother putting on a bra to go from your apartment to your friend's apartment for wine night! This could be revolutionary.
8. Sassy Siri
Photo by Omid Armin on UnsplashEvery girl could use someone to help them come up with the perfect come back in a pinch, and who better than Siri! With her constantly involved in your conversations, it would be easy to just ask Siri for a little sass-assistance the next time your best frenemy mocks your highlights.
9. Compliment Earrings
Photo by Arteum.ro on UnsplashIf you have never seen Aquamarine, go rent it now. For those who recall, the star fish earrings were "notorious suck ups" to the girls who wore them. Imagine going through a tough day, when unexpectedly you are given a compliment! Talk about a great mid-day pick up.
10. Food Printer
My stalking of Pinterest food pages has progressed from a mild addiction to a full blown problem; I always find I want the things I see in the pictures immediately. I want to be able to hit print on one of the pictures and have those lemon-blueberry iced cupcakes in my kitchen right then.
11. Necklace De-Tangler
Photo by Martin de Arriba on UnsplashLadies across the country lose thousands of necklaces to tangled knots. Chains break, two beautiful separates become one big mess, and before you know it your jewelry box is empty! There must be a machine where one could drop their knotted necklaces and have them come out the other side in perfect condition.
12. Hot Slippers
On a cold Monday morning when walking around the kitchen, debating which is worse, waking up or being awake, it would be nice to be comfortable. Nice pajamas are all well and good, but a fuzzy pair of slippers that can become warm? That is the dream. There is no morning too grey or hangover too intense that would not be cured with these slippers.
13. Calorie Rewind
Photo by i yunmai on UnsplashThere needs to be a way to take back that entire pepperoni pizza you ate last night. Whether you were not in the proper state of mind to be making that decision, or even if it was emotional turmoil over exams; it shouldn't count. Perhaps the next big thing in weightloss is a pill that allows you to take back a meal. A way to go back in time and undo that embarrassing trip to the doughnut shop down the road in favor of a more healthy alternative? Not a bad idea.
14. Sleepy-Time Studying
How awesome would it be if you could fall asleep with headphones in and wake up knowing an entire textbook? Humans spend an average of 26 years sleeping-- there should be a way to put that time to good use. A way to absorb the information while you sleep should be the next big invention. It would be the perfect cure to the all nighter!
15. Decision Making App
Photo by Towfiqu barbhuiya on UnsplashDesperately struggling to pick where to go for dinner? Unable to decide whether to go out or stay in? Unsure of whether it's a day for heels or for flats? These are the everyday questions faced by thousands of Millennials. We need to find a cure for the indecisiveness. An app that takes the guess work out of meaningless day to day questions such as, "Do I want a grande or a vent?" (Or I suppose you could just flip a coin...)
Bonus 16. Articles That Write Themselves
Photo by Kaitlyn Baker on UnsplashI wish I had a magic box I could give an idea to and it would instantly put print out the article I am trying to write.