We have all seen the memes about the uber-obsessed, stalker-like girlfriend who talks about all the things any sane individual wishes to avoid in a relationship. Cheating, lying, distance, the whole nine yards. But, what people do not realize that, though these memes are funny and totally outrageous, they bring light to a very serious issue, especially to the newer generation, my own included.
Relationships have become a thing of the past. It seems everyone my age and younger is looking for “hook ups,” or sex and no commitment. And that has had a negative backlash when people are looking for someone to settle down with near the more adult years of their lives.
I am not saying that it isn’t OK to date around, but you cannot expect respect if you don’t give yourself some. Too many times, media makes it seem like being committed to one person makes you weak, like you’ve given too much power to the other person. A real relationship is about compromise. It’s about finding the faults in someone and loving them because it makes them who they are. It’s about arguing, fighting for each other and proving that no matter what you disagree on, you’ll stick it out.
If a guy refers to you as his "main girl," you should be worried because the only reason for him to differentiate between you being the “main” would be if he had other people on the side. If a girl keeps accusing you of cheating, even though you haven’t given her any reason to think that, then it’s time to sit down and have a talk, because that means she doesn’t trust you. And isn’t that what a relationship is all about: trust?
I’m no expert by any means, but I do know that I’ve seen too many friends put all their hopes, dreams and effort into making a failing relationship last, knowing full well it was sucking more out of them then what they were getting back. As a generation, we need to learn how to tough it through the fights we have with a boyfriend or a girlfriend, because it is through these arguments that we learn the most about each other. As a generation, we need to learn how to respect each other's beliefs and wishes, because forcing a relationship to work is worse than addressing the issues then and there. As a generation, we need to know what love is and the difference between loving someone and falling in love with someone because all too often we through these words and terms around without fully realizing the gravity what it could bring. As a generation, we need to stop being afraid of the commitment and responsibility associated with being in a relationship, because it is a practice for the rest of our lives.