Let’s face it, more often than not we are stuck in a never-ending cycle of doing things we don’t want to. Whether it is because we feel bad or maybe haven’t done something in a while and just feel like we should, we, as human beings, are people-pleasing-creatures of habit. I bet you can’t even count the number of times you pretended to be excited about something you really didn’t care about. This gruesome cycle ends today.

This summer is about working on yourself, for yourself… so let’s get started. First things first, I’m going to need you to stop saying yes to everything. If you don’t want to do it, or can’t quite squeeze it in, say NO. I know you feel guilty, trust me I get it, but I promise that they will get over the fact that you can’t come with them to pick up their little brother from camp on a random Tuesday afternoon. I understand that it is easier said than done, but you will not regret it. You should never feel guilty about relaxing or doing something for yourself every once in a while! Come to think of it, if you start saying no to things that you really don’t want to do, maybe you will be in a consistently better mood, and who wouldn’t love that?

Now that you have started to weed out the boring activities that you aren’t interested in, look at all that free time. What should you do with this free time you ask? Well, I have some ideas. How about you pick up a new hobby? Maybe you could try to paint something or learn to cook your favorite meal. Sit in the sun for hours (with sunblock, of course) to work on a killer tan or go to the gym to try and lose that stubborn weight you never had time to worry about. You could learn how to do Sudoku or attempt to complete one of those hard crossword puzzles from the newspaper. You could even try and learn an instrument and reread your favorite books… or better yet, find new ones! The possibilities are endless when time allows for it.

Regardless of what exactly it is that you decide to do, let it be for you. This summer is the perfect time to cut out toxic people that you no longer have the time, or energy, for. There is no need for you to make time for people or plans out of courtesy or habit. This summer is about forming new friendships with people who make you a better you. This summer is about growth and prosperity… and anyone, or anything, that no longer fits in your schedule to success, is no longer necessarily. Quit feeling guilty about everything you do… this summer is your time to shine.

Listen, I know this is all easier said than done, but I want you to try a little at a time. Maybe you could start by skipping a night out to take a bath and binge watch Netflix. Once you learn to appreciate time with yourself, you might even find that you value this time more than time spent with certain other people. By the end of summer, you will feel lighter… not only because of the pounds you left in the gym, but because you will no longer be carrying around the burden of expectations. This summer is about you… it’s finally time you start acting like it!