Don't let your struggles define you...

Time for some major truth about myself. On a daily basis, I struggle; I battle with anxiety and depression. I don't feel like I am good enough for my job, my friendships, and this new, 2-year long adventure. I am a massive people pleaser, which means I question my actions on a daily basis and dwell on my mistakes for days. I want to be a light to others, and make them happy. This often turns into a battle with myself and I question whether or not I can actually be a light. I'm far too needy for my own good. And I doubt my date-ability. These are the things that I battle with daily. The thoughts that run through my head on a regular basis. These are my mountains. And I plan to climb these mountains with my hands wide open, and holding on to nothing.

"I will climb these mountains with my hands wide open."

Lucky for me this isn't who I am. Most of these things are just lies that the enemy tells me on a daily basis that I happen to believe. The enemy tries to get in my head and fill me with lies. But the truth is this: Jesus says I am so much more than the lies the enemy tries to tell me. I choose to believe the things that Jesus tells me instead of what Satan does. I choose to believe that I am good enough for everything that God places before me. I choose to turn to the Lord when my anxiety and depression gets the best of me. I choose to continue to be a light and make people happy but I choose to not let it take over my life. And I choose to believe that my neediness is just a desire to be around people because I am fueled by people. Jesus doesn't want us to believe the lies. He doesn't want us to dwell on things that we can't change. Instead, he wants us to chase after Him, and live our lives in light of who He is and how much He loves us. So that is what I choose to do, leave all things behind me and chase after Jesus.

"I choose to believe the things that Jesus tells me instead of what Satan does."

The reality of all this is that these struggles are still going to exist, I am still going to doubt and have anxiety, I will still probably dwell on things as well second guess everything I do. But at least with choosing Jesus and his desires I know where to go when my anxiety hits I know who to turn to and run after and that is a God who sent His son to die for us, He doesn't want us to feel unloved, undesired, or in any sort of pain. He wants us to know our worth, know that we are loved and enough. So that is what I choose to believe.