I am guilty of being a Tinder user, but it really isn't what you think. I am content with myself, though yes, there are times where I feel lonely and I want to meet people. But I happen to understand that Tinder isn't about "finding your soulmate." Even though some have found the love of their life through this one aspect of social media, others don't. This to the people who never find the one that they're looking for.

First things first, I have Tinder only to see the people who I know use it, and trust me, I've seen quite enough on there. I have found plenty of people I went to high school with and also people that I see on campus. It's a small world. I see Tinder as a way for others to seek happiness with, well, pleasure. There is a difference between these two. The many guys that I have talked to within my time at home astonish me, as their one goal is to "hook up." As a woman, I don't like that, and most other girls don't either, because we strive so hard to settle down and be in a relationship, when most guys just want to get the job done.

So, why else do we use Tinder? If you're like me, and you go on to see who's on, then that's your reason. Or how about finding a friend? It doesn't hurt to find a great guy friend, and to be honest, I have found someone that I am solely good friends with now. There is honestly nothing wrong with that. I constantly delete this app, and also constantly go back to it, but on rare occasions. I'm not judging those that do use Tinder in hopes of finding their soulmate, but learn that not everything is what it may appear to be.

We like to put ourselves out there to make others know that there are plenty of fish in the sea. It all depends on how much of yourself you want to share. When you want to meet these people in actual life, it's always good to be extra careful. Tag a friend along so it seems casual. It sends that person a message saying, "hey, we're just meeting each other for the first time. Nothing legit, yet." You never what these people are like until you actually meet them.

Now, stop using Tinder. You won't automatically listen to me, but you will not find whatever you're looking for on Tinder. I'm fairly traditional and always would like to meet someone first as a person. Let that one come to you. Don't look, because the more you look, the harder it will get, and the more narrow-minded you become. Girls complain about how guys don't commit and how guys are always about sex. Honestly, that isn't the case, because women are just the same. We just tend to keep that part of us low key. As much as we hate to admit it, this is just a way to fill that pleasure part of us.

Of course, we use Tinder to fill this void in our hearts. The desire of pleasure, happiness, and being in love. It is every human's dream to find the one, but you will. I promise you will. Patience is a virtue.

In this day in age, we contemplate the idea of being in a relationship. Like, what the heck does that mean? Why label something? It may be just a label to most of us, but it means that your happiness has been found with someone who has the same amount of happiness that you do. "Commitment issues" does not mean anything. You are committed; you're just scared. "I have trust issues." With everyone? Ha ha! Trust is key, and is built upon opening yourself up to someone. If you allow yourself to talk about your whole life with them with no judgement, then the key to trust has opened the lock to your mind and heart. "I'm not ready for a relationship." Says the one who has been with many people, but if you say so.

Like I said, stop looking through social media. Go out into this world. You might bump into your soulmate at a social event, a bookstore, or maybe even Walmart. That's the best way to find that one. Until then, enjoy the time you have with yourself. There's so much to learn about yourself before you learn about someone else.