You Need To Forgive | The Odyssey Online
Start writing a post
Health and Wellness

You Need To Forgive

Forgiveness is a selfish and selfless act.

62
You Need To Forgive

Forgiveness is often seen as such a small word, but there is so much more to it than that. Forgiveness is often misconstrued as meaning something else; it is taken to mean forgetting the pain someone has caused you, or letting the pain happen again, reliving it. But that’s not what it means. Forgiving is not forgetting. Forgiving someone is both a selfish and selfless act. We do it for ourselves, so we can heal, so we can move past (but never forget or relive) the pain we have been through. We have to do this; we have to forgive. We have to forgive so we can allow our own hearts to heal because the anger, pain, and frustration we keep inside will do nothing more than consume us from the inside out. Let me say this another way: staying angry at someone does not affect them — it affects you. The anger finds ways to redirect itself where least desired, where least effective.

We forgive for ourselves.

If for no other reason, do it for yourself. For your mental, physical, and emotional health. Keeping pain, anger, and other negative emotions pent up truly hurts oneself either short term or long term. The pain and anger will affect you, I promise. It will present itself in your relationships, your work, and anything else. The longer one keeps the anger inside without forgiving, the worse off that person will be. Most times we do not see the damage pent up emotions have on a person, because it is inside. It changes a person, being angry for that long. Forgiveness does not mean you suddenly like the person. It means that you see what has happened, and you’ve accepted it because you know there is nothing you can do any more to change it. Forgiving makes it so that you can move on, so that you can begin to heal and live a normal life again.

We forgive for them.

Sometimes, even, we forgive for the other person. The other person could be carrying guilt, frustration, and anger just like any other person. This is most common in relationships, friendships, and all other kinds of –ships. If one person does wrong, and then they feel horrible for what they did and they’re working to repair the damage. The pain and angry could be destroying them to the point of breaking, of mental un-wellness. Obviously don’t do this until you are ready, but it is a necessary step for the recovery of everyone involved.

We forgive for us.

Lastly, we forgive for the sake of moving forward as a couple, the “us.” People make mistakes in relationships because relationships are difficult and there is no way around that. Everyone says it, and I will merely repeat it once: relationships take work. When you love someone, you love them for who and all that they are, including their mistakes. No one is infallible. They will not be the only one to make a mistake in the relationship, and it won’t be their first mistake either if you decide to be with them for a longer period of time. We are human, we screw up (sometimes really bad), but at the end of the day we are loving creatures who deserve to be forgiven for merely being human, for succumbing to the stresses around us, for breaking down when the world seems against us.

I’m human, you’re human. So forgive them.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
friends
Photo by Elizeu Dias on Unsplash

If I have learned one thing in my lifetime, it is that friends are a privilege. No one is required to give you their company and yet there is some sort of shared connection that keeps you together. And from that friendship, you may even find yourself lucky enough to have a few more friends, thus forming a group. Here are just a few signs that prove your current friend group is the ultimate friend group.

Keep Reading...Show less
ross and monica
FanPop

When it comes to television, there’s very few sets of on-screen siblings that a lot of us can relate to. Only those who have grown up with siblings knows what it feels like to fight, prank, and love a sibling. Ross and Monica Geller were definitely overbearing and overshared some things through the series of "Friends," but they captured perfectly what real siblings feel in real life. Some of their antics were funny, some were a little weird but all of them are completely relatable to brothers and sisters everywhere.

Keep Reading...Show less
Sorority Girls
Owl Eyes Magazine

College is a great place to meet people, especially through Greek life. If you look closely at sororities, you'll quickly see there are many different types of girls you will meet.

1. The Legacy.

Her sister was a member, her mom was a member, all of her aunts were members, and her grandma was a member. She has been waiting her whole life to wear these letters and cried hysterically on bid day. Although she can act entitled at times, you can bet she is one of the most enthusiastic sisters.

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

10 Reasons Why Life Is Better In The Summertime

Winter blues got you down? Summer is just around the corner!

506
coconut tree near shore within mountain range
Photo by Elizeu Dias on Unsplash

Every kid in college and/or high school dreams of summer the moment they walk through the door on the first day back in September. It becomes harder and harder to focus in classes and while doing assignments as the days get closer. The winter has been lagging, the days are short and dark, and no one is quite themselves due to lack of energy and sunlight. Let's face it: life is ten times better in the summertime.

Keep Reading...Show less
Relationships

10 Things That Describe You and Your College Friends

The craziest, funniest, and most unforgettable college memories are impossible to create without an amazing group of friends.

280
College Friends
Marina Lombardi

1. You'll never run out of clothes when you have at least four closets to choose from.

2. You embrace and encourage each other’s horrible, yet remarkable dance moves.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments