You Can’t Make Someone Love You…

You Can’t Make Someone Love You…

A letter to the girl who is trying.
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There is always that one boy... the one you imagine life with, smile from ear to ear any time you see them, and have definitely spent some serious time stalking on social media. This is the same boy that takes hours to respond to texts, if he responds at all, and doesn't make plans to see you. And it breaks your heart just a little more each time.

Sure you tell yourself to let it go. Your friends gently remind you that he isn’t worth your time. But something keeps you hanging on, like when he snapchats you his adorable face, or finally responds to a text and tells you you’re beautiful. When you’re together, he makes you feel like the only one in a crowded room. That little bit of hope keeps him on your mind.

You know in the back of your head that it will never turn into anything. You try to convince yourself to not let your emotions get in the way. All the signs for failure are right in front of you. But then he smiles and your heart wins over every rational thought your head has ever had.

You make up excuses for him. He couldn’t respond because his phone died. When he just waved instead of walking over to say hello he was running late for class. He canceled plans with you because he had a family emergency. Sometimes you keep what’s going on from your friends because you just can’t tell them he let you down again.

He doesn’t love you though. This boy isn’t worth your time or energy. You have so much to give and you know it. You deserve someone who gets lost looking into your eyes. The person who needs to see you and wants to spend time together. You want someone who laughs at your quirky sense of humor and the adorable way you snort when you laugh at a really funny joke. The one who holds your hand any chance he gets. You need someone who would put you first. Someone who doesn’t even think twice about lending you his jacket on a cold night or kissing you on the forehead in front of his friends.

You have all this life and love to give and you deserve a sincerely good guy. This guy that’s on your mind right now… he may be a good guy. He might half heartedly do things that make you melt inside. But maybe right now he can’t give you what you deserve.

You shouldn’t waste your time. Walk away. Stop entertaining the idea that you can change him into what you need and what you deserve. And stop letting this boy control your moods and emotions. Put the energy into yourself. Become so happy with who you are that when the right boy does come along there will be no turning back. Listen to your mom, your friends, your sister because they are right when they tell you this isn’t the one.

You can’t make someone love you and you shouldn’t try. You deserve someone who loves you with every ounce of their heart.

Cover Image Credit: Making Love Sustainable

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Why Getting Away From Where You Grew Up Is Important

College is the perfect time to get away from home and go out into the real world.
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As you get older, life sometimes makes it hard for you to take control and go to the places you've only dreamed of. There's always a work meeting, ballet recital, or something to hold you back from taking that trip planned four summers ago. College is the perfect time to get away from home and go out into the real world.

It's important to get away from everything you know at one point in your life. There is a whole world full of risk, chance, and experience. The security you have in your hometown can be traded in for adventure and change. There's a time to try something new, learn something that blows your mind, or go somewhere that takes your breath away. That time is now, to feel like you are actually doing something worthwhile with your life.

It is important to get away from where you have grown up for some of your life. You need to grow on your own, without anyone there to tell you you're wrong or out of line being a certain way. The transition from high school to college is the gift of independence. You choose who you get to be without anyone holding your past against you. It's a do-over, a second chance after the mistakes and regrets you lived through in high school. Yet, being away from home has its drawbacks as you lose familiar faces, a steady schedule, and many creature comforts. But, all of these can be found in a new place with time. Leaving the place you grew up gives you another chance to grow again, without boundaries. Travel whenever you get an opportunity because it may not come again. Test your limits while living your actual dreams. Go out and explore the world—you're only here once and don't have time to take it for granted. Leaving everything you know sounds scary, but there are great memories to be made out there.

Whether this new place for you is two hours from home, or 20, it's different, it's exciting and it's change. It is important to get away from where you grew up and learn from the adventures you embark on. It is the best way to find yourself and who you want to be. It's what you'll remember when you look back on everything you've done.

Cover Image Credit: Madison Burns

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For Camille, With Love

To my godmother, my second mom, my rooted confidence, my support

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First grade, March. It was my first birthday without my mom. You through a huge party for me, a sleepover with friends from school. It included dress up games and making pizza and Disney trivia. You, along with help from my grandma, threw me the best birthday party a 7-year-old could possibly want.

During elementary school, I carpooled with you and a few of the neighborhood kids. I was always the last one to be dropped off, sometimes you would sneak a donut for me. Living next door to you was a blessing. You helped me with everything. In second grade, you helped me rehearse lines for history day so I could get extra credit. In 4th grade, you helped me build my California mission.

You and your sister came out to my 6th grade "graduation". You bought me balloons and made me feel as if moving onto middle school was the coolest thing in the entire world.

While you moved away from next door, you were a constant in my life. Going to Ruby's Diner for my birthday, seeing movies at the Irvine Spectrum and just hanging out, I saw you all the time. During these times, you told me about all of the silly things you did with my mom and dad, how my mom was your best friend. I couldn't have had a greater godmother.

In middle school, you pushed me to do my best and to enroll in honors. You helped me through puberty and the awkward stages of being a woman.

Every single time I saw you, it would light up my entire day, my week. You were more than my godmother, you were my second mom. You understood things that my grandma didn't.

When you married John, you included me in your wedding. I still have that picture of you, Jessica, Aaron and myself on my wall at college. I was so happy for you.

Freshmen year of high school, you told me to do my best. I did my best because of you. When my grandma passed away that year, your shoulder was the one I wanted to cry on.

You were there when I needed to escape home. You understood me when I thought no one would. You helped me learn to drive, letting me drive all the way from San Clemente to Orange.

When I was applying to colleges, you encouraged me to spread my wings and fly. You told me I should explore, get out of California. I wanted to study in London, you told me to do it. That's why, when I study abroad this Spring in London, I will do it for you.

When I had gotten into UWT, you told me to go there. I did and here I am, succeeding and living my best in Tacoma. I do it for you, because of you.

When I graduated high school and I was able to deliver a speech during our baccalaureate, you cheered me on. You recorded it for me, so I could show people who weren't able to make it to the ceremony. You were one of the few people able to come to my actual graduation. You helped me celebrate the accomplishments and awards from my hard work.

When your cancer came back, I was so worried. I was afraid for you, I was afraid of what I would do without the support you had always given me. When I was in Rome, I went to the Vatican and had gotten a Cross with a purple gem in the middle blessed by the Pope to help you with your treatments. It was something from me and a little bit of my mom in the necklace, the gem.

Now, sitting so far from you away at college just like you wanted me to. I miss you. I wish I was there to say goodbye.

I'll travel the world for you, write lots of stories and books for you, I will live life to the fullest for you.

You are another angel taken too early in life. Please say hello to my parents and grandma in Heaven for me.

Lots of love,

Haiden

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