To preface this story, I have been single for a while now. I went through an incredibly rough break up, on my end, at the beginning of my sophomore year of college. That relationship and my ones prior have sort of ruined me for relationships as a whole. Sure, I have tried to get myself out there, but it is hard when you have trust issues especially when it comes to relationships. Throughout these past couple months, I have tried dating apps. You know your normal ways to meet someone in college. Except, I decided to change things up this past weekend.
I had the joy of getting to go out to party. The first one I have been to in a while, might I add. Whilst at this party, I decided to try to talk to a very attractive male. I am incredibly awkward, so my go-to flirting technique is to simply just compliment someone. I also like to chat a ton, when I have had a bit to drink. The guy was just randomly standing next to me and I just completely decided to go for it. So all I did was compliment him on his shirt, which looked incredibly comfortable and soft might I add. To which he felt the need to respond, "Oh thank you, but you need to stop smothering me," and walked away. I don't know about you, but I was taken back by this statement. All I had done was try to chat up and compliment this young gentleman on his shirt.
Dating has become such a weird concept since coming to college. I am never sure how to talk to guys because of situations like that one. Nor do I honestly know how to talk to guys in general. Kudos to everyone else who has figured it out. I am still waiting too. What I do know though, is that more women should feel confident to make the first move and here's why:
1. It's Sexy AF
Guys want a break
2. It's Bold
In a male-dominated society, why not be the one to push the boundaries? Just because we grew up with parents who still have the American Dream idea dream mindset, does not mean that women cannot rise up to the challenge. Who cares about who kissed who first, when in the end it was a good kiss. Plus, you will be helping women everywhere to rewrite the rules.
3. It Puts You In Control
Why wait for someone else, when you could honestly be waiting forever for that person? It's such an empowering moment. When I made the first move to kiss one of my exes, for the first time, I was not only amazed that he was an amazing kisser, but that he was happy that I had done it because he was too scared to.
4. The Worst That Could Happen Is They Say No
If they say no, then that is perfectly okay. Do not pressure someone into something that they do not want to do. Not only is consent key, consent is also sexy. So when in doubt always ask if it is okay and hey you never know what will happen.
Even though this one mishap with some random dude happened, I am not going to let it stop me from being confident enough to talk to a cute guy, even if it is just to compliment him. I do think that I will let fate take the wheel to see what happens and if it means me or the guy making the first move, then so be it. Plus I am a sucker for meeting guys the old fashion way, anyway, so who knows what will happen. Maybe it will be them the next time.