I've never had to question my faith.
I grew up in a dedicated Catholic family. I had a grandpa who was a deacon and parents who provided the music at mass every Sunday. Everything I learned about religion, I took for granted. I never questioned it, and in my Catholic school environment, no one else I spent time with did either. It almost got to the point where I was getting bored. I felt there was no learning left to do in relation to Christianity. I had heard the same stories over and over again and practiced in the same ways repeatedly.
It was only recently that I discovered a game changer. I began a course in philosophy titled "Philosophy and Religion." The first day of class, I sat down and read the screen. It said that the primary focus of the lectures would be debating the existence of an all-good God. For me, someone who is so dependent on faith and belief, that was a terrifying statement. I immediately thought, "What if someone gives me a question that I can't answer? What if I can't defend God?" I was worried I'd lose the argument, or even worse, lose my faith and feel completely lost.
I didn't want to just drop the class and run in the other direction. To me, that would feel like avoiding something that was inevitable. People are going to doubt your faith, question it, and feel uncomfortable with it in life. If it came down to it, I wasn't sure how I would stand up for God - how I would stand up for Christians everywhere. So much is happening in the world and blame is constantly thrown around. How could I make people see that one event or one person doesn't determine the lifestyle of every associated human? I decided that I needed to take this class, learn more about my faith, and learn how to counter the arguments put in front of me. I had to do it, not only for my own sake but for the sake of people everywhere who feel looked down on for believing how they do.
My decision was one of the better ones I've made in life. Not only did I gain more knowledge in the logical and historical aspect of Christianity, but I learned to respect other peoples' opinions while maintaining my own, as well as how to debate and educate in a manner that doesn't seem pushy or judgmental. I am able to seek out answers and find new discoveries about my faith. I now find excitement in looking at an argument against God and seeking out ways to defend Him.
Of course, there will always be a leap of faith whether you believe in God or not. There is just no physical evidence at this time to prove anything of this importance. However, there is beauty in gaining knowledge and trusting in one's faith. It gives the same awe inspired feeling as looking at a breathtaking view does. It's a feeling that says, "There is more. There is something bigger than all of this. There is a Creator and Designer."
I question my faithto make it stronger and more passionate.I have found that when I began to question my faith, I also decided to defend it harder and fight for it. I looked for answers, and along the way discovered a deeper relationship with God.