Ever since I was a little kid, teachers have told me that I was a good student, but they wished that I would speak up more in class. No matter how many assignments I got good marks on, or how well I behaved, the comments always came back to “You’re too quiet” and “You don’t talk enough,” or, “I wish you’d come out of your shell.”

In high school, the class-clown would turn around to look at me with a wry smile on his face, “You’re too quiet,” he’d say, “You must have some dark secrets you’re not letting us in on.” I would laugh quietly and not respond. It was too much to explain to him that I simply did not feel like talking. Why waste the energy on chatter when I could spend the time happily in my own mind?

Today, I find it interesting that his first reaction to my quiet demeanor was to assume I was hiding something. He took it personally, as if my reluctance to share my thoughts with him was a selfish act.

The dictionary defines introverts as “shy, reticent and typically self-centered”, while the extrovert is honored with the description, “outgoing and overtly expressive”. If a job recruiter were to see these descriptions on two different resumes, he would undoubtedly choose the extrovert. When we’re in school, we’re encouraged to be leaders and team-players, to develop our communication skills because that’s what we need in the real world. But this incessant importance placed on the ability to interact can feel like an attack on the introvert. Those who gain their energy through solitude quickly learn that silence isn’t accepted. In this fast-paced world, we have to learn how to be constantly communicative in order to succeed.

When we introduce ourselves as introverted, people assume that we are reclusive, or inept at social interaction, but these ideas are constructed by an attitude that is prevalent as early as elementary school. Introverts may be described as ‘shy’ and ‘reticent’, but really, they just succeed in a different way than extroverts do. Extroverts become energized by connecting with others, and introverts become energized by connecting with themselves.

Neither of these methods are wrong.

In her book, “Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can't Stop Talking,” Susan Cain dictates it beautifully, “The secret to life is to put yourself in the right lighting. For some, it's a Broadway spotlight; for others, a lamplit desk.” Not everyone works their best when surrounded by people, and that’s OK. The key is to find out what environment you work best in, and let yourself shine there.

It can be difficult, especially in today’s environment, to allow yourself to be an introvert. With Facebook, Snapchat and Instagram commanding our day-to-day lives, it is easy to fall into the abyss of people that just want to be heard. When you fall into your news feed, and see your friends hanging out with one another, it can be easy to feel inadequate because you aren’t socializing with them. In this society where constant communication is key, it’s scary to allow yourself to be alone.

But if you find that constantly talking and interacting with others exhausts you, give yourself a break. Allow yourself to spend your time the way that you want to, not how you feel you should. This could be reading a book, listening to music, or going to a museum alone. Give yourself time to think and contemplate, just breathe and live in your thoughts for a bit.

As far as society goes, I don’t know how much can be changed. As we grow up, we will always be interacting with other people, talking to them and learning from them. But as a society I think we could just work to understand one another. Remind people that kids who are quiet shouldn’t be admonished for their silence, but appreciated for their ability to keep themselves entertained. And if someone interprets your quietness as secrecy, tell them that you simply would rather listen than speak.

Introversion is not something to be ashamed of, it is a power. It’s a way of thinking that allows you to feel close with yourself. It’s an attitude that does not require the outside world to function. Introverts, just like extroverts, are thoughtful, contemplative and innovative. So don’t underestimate yourself as an introvert. Your voice may be quieter, but your thoughts are just as strong.