On average, we lie at least three times in each conversation we have with another person. The biggest lie we tell? "I'm good, how are you?"

I really figured out that I needed to address my mental health when someone asked me that age-old question "Hey, how are you?" and I said "I'm good, and you?" knowing full well that was a lie.

As this semester comes to a close, I'm readdressing how I've dealt with the trauma I experienced. I'm only now able to refer to it as trauma, even, because I've been so hesitant to admit that I'll never get over my hospitalization (If you have no clue what I am referring to please refer to one of my previous articles).

Mental health is so complex and difficult to understand that people aren't as quick to call these situations what they are; traumatic. I think it relates back to the general misunderstanding of what it really means to be suffering mentally. Persistent sadness is not a concept that's easy to come to terms with if you've never experienced it yourself.

The worst part about dealing with trauma is the triggers you do not realize you have. Prior to hospitalization, I had understood people's triggers and the purpose of trigger warnings but only in the far away, "I'll never have these" sense. Now, I have a few things that thrust me back into the way I felt on the wrong medication and I wish I had a way to avoid coming into contact with them.

For me, a trigger is when the phone rings. It has to be the old-school ringtone, the ring-ring that stresses people out in horror films. Every time I hear a phone ring like that I feel absolute devastation. The best way to explain it is when you're watching a movie about a high-school student and their alarm goes off. That relentless beeping noise triggers us all by jumpstarting our hearts and waking us up like it has for years. For me, the phone ringing reminds me of a very specific and upsetting moment during my hospitalization.

If you're suffering mentally, you can admit it. The worst thing a person can do is bottle up their emotions and not inform people that maybe they're not doing well, maybe they need help or they're just having a bad day. Once we stop lying to ourselves, we can stop lying to each other and more conversations about mental health will be had.

If you're like me, you're not okay still and that's okay. Your current state does not define who you are or who you will be. I can't be warned about the phone ringing. That's not something there's a trigger warning for. Instead, I have to learn to cope with feeling like the room is beginning to fill with water and remind myself that I'm here, I'm alive, and that it is okay to not be "good, thank you."

If you are also battling for strong mental health, please seek out help from the Suicide Prevention Lifeline and talk to someone who can help.